Heidi Lux profile page

Heidi Lux Los Angeles

Heidi Lux is a screenwriter and satirist. She wrote Crushed now streaming on Tubi and has written for sites including Eater, Reductress, CollegeHumor, Cracked, The Belladonna, and McSweeney’s.

Comedy Writing

Am I Crazy for Thinking James Bond and I Shared Something Special in That Radioactive Volcano?

Sorry. This is awkward. We, uh, you know. On a raft? That was also a car? That you drove straight into the water?

by Heidi Lux
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January 20, 2026

All Our Luxury Hotel Room Bathrooms Are Panopticons Now, for Lovers

Our panopticon toilet utilizes ruthless social engineering to give you the most intimate experience with your partner.

by Heidi Lux
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February 10, 2025
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2

Our Neighborhood Watch Is Just a Guy Holding a Plastic Bag Watching Women Parallel Park

We dispatch a man with a plastic bag (full of loose Arizona iced teas) to stare at her so hard she gets the dry sweats.

by Heidi Lux
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May 2, 2024

Your Horoscope for When the Trappist Exoplanets are in Retrograde

We don’t know if Trappist 1-h’s theoretical moons exist or not, but the motions of these maybe-moons are still going to fuck your shit up, Cancer.

by Heidi Lux
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October 19, 2018