Humor Columns

The Terrain’s Tide

A writer in the Appalachian mountains pours over his last words, pondering his past and the despair over his wife.

Nothing says mixed signals like a Catholic mass where your priest expedites the worship process so he can catch the Dolphins kick-off.

Eating out doesn't have to be expensive, but if you wanna get the job done right, you might have to spring for a bullhorn and a diamond ring.

Seven steps to turn a regular party into a straight female slobberfest, including the sure-fire technique for inducing repeat girl-on-girl kissing.

You pick the less desirable scenario: completely unexpected, highly-visible hard-ons; or totally controllable, scheduled leakage?

They'll torture you in every way, most notably, sleeping around with the ugliest men possible. Why? Because they're attention-whores.

Do your research, show up late, and don't forget to come bearing gifts of drugs or alcohol. Congratulations, you're deep in unknown territory.

Thanks, U.S. government, for telling us exactly when and how gambling is not wrong and immoral. Bet that goes for marijuana too, huh?

The mildly misogynistic ramblings of a young man struggling to walk the line between being happy and being sober.

Testing his uncanny capacity to endure the worst life has to offer, Dave hits the town's most horrible bars, one after the next.

Once again, we review the barely passable cinema that is Tribeca. Caution, extensive viewing may result in serious mental regression.

An eloquent disposition on the experiences and people inherent to college life from the perspective of an outright asshole.