When someone tells you their spring break was "pretty relaxing," this translates to "I went home and I was fucking bored out of my mind."
Have you ever noticed how everyone gets sick when they come back for second semester? This has everything to do with the disruption of the alcoholic equilibrium.
Do you have friends who use someone’s old driver’s license as a fake ID? My friends are like, "Check it out, it looks just like me!" and I'm like, "That looks nothing like you."
Everyone WITH a printer has at least one "printing asshole." These are the people who always drain your paper supply every time they feel like printing something out.
The only good thing about having a week's worth of newspaper scattered all over the floor is that it serves as a good "puke-protector" by the time the weekend comes.
Is there some kind of requirement that English has to be your second language to teach math in college? I guess they figure that math is some kind of universal language.
They've taken this whole celebrate-the-year-2000 thing way too far. Yesterday, I saw a gallon of milk that said "commemorating the millennium" on it.
I was always told that you can't be thirsty and need to piss at the same time. If this is true, all rules are off the morning after a hard night of drinking.
You know those little things that you kinda wonder about in the back of your head, but think are too "insignificant" to waste any time thinking about? I'm writing about 'em.
A compilation of the oddest and most intriguing aspects of college life. An original college humor column started in 1999 with a website spinoff.