The latest from our humor columns. Everyday Artists | PIC Newspaper | First Lecture | Simon Says
Have you ever met someone from class and become pretty good "campus friends" only to find out like 3 months later that neither of you knows the other person’s name?
Did you know that if you actually READ the error message on a copier, you can usually fix the problem in about 30 seconds?
Most of my co-workers complain during the day about being tired of doing so much work. As an intern, the only thing I got tired of was appearing to be busy.
Remember freshman year when you had no idea WHAT you would need when you got to college? Now I'm a junior and know exactly what I need, but I'm too lazy to pack it all.
Most people end up getting sick at some point from being "too stressed out" during finals. I'm going to vomit on the next person who thinks I should pity them for this.
When someone tells you their spring break was "pretty relaxing," this translates to "I went home and I was fucking bored out of my mind."
Have you ever noticed how everyone gets sick when they come back for second semester? This has everything to do with the disruption of the alcoholic equilibrium.
Do you have friends who use someone’s old driver’s license as a fake ID? My friends are like, "Check it out, it looks just like me!" and I'm like, "That looks nothing like you."
Everyone WITH a printer has at least one "printing asshole." These are the people who always drain your paper supply every time they feel like printing something out.
The only good thing about having a week's worth of newspaper scattered all over the floor is that it serves as a good "puke-protector" by the time the weekend comes.
Is there some kind of requirement that English has to be your second language to teach math in college? I guess they figure that math is some kind of universal language.
They've taken this whole celebrate-the-year-2000 thing way too far. Yesterday, I saw a gallon of milk that said "commemorating the millennium" on it.