I just went to check my Yahoo!!!!!!!!!!!1111 mail and noticed that some spam got through into my inbox. While this is not unusual, the thing that was unusual is that these messages did not even try to cover themselves up or get past the spam filter. Blatant spam at its worst:

SUBJECT:To get your cock stiff in
seconds, click here. I can never have too much cock inside me, so I can

MESSAGE: Salty sweet cock juice, order here. They
shove them down their throats and then blow massive amounts of cum.

Ironically, the link was to a blog for a Baptist church. Coincidence…..???

And what would the rest of the subject have said if it didn't get cut off? “I can never have too much cock inside me, so I can do… anyone that comes my way?” “I can never have too much cock inside me, so I can do… my taxes?”

SUBJECT: Tight little spinners getting
speared by massive cocks. Horny Sluts Belching spunk.

These guys' dicks are as big as a kickstand. Horny
asian girls getting fucked and riding enormous cocks.

These guys' dicks are as big as a kickstand…and just as thin!

SUBJECT: Mouth watering cocks just
waiting to be sucked hard, click here. to swallow Monster Facials, click

Live & Nasty fuck feeds. Tight
pussies receiving massive dicks, it hurts so good.

‘Hurts so good'? Yes, I fucking love John Mellencamp! ::click:: Ohhh…..

SUBJECT: Try it out. Hot girls getting
it on with each other.

Get in touch with a
college hottie and stick her and her best friend. Hot blonde Dutch girls
spraying their golden love on your chest.

Well, since you asked so nicely I'll try it out. Give anything a try once, right? Wait…spraying golden love? I hope that literally means love and is not a metaphor for OH GOD THAT'S PISS

SUBJECT: However, I always wished that I was bigger and I was embarrassed of my size when I was in the locker
MESSAGE: Safely and effectively add length, width, and strength to man's penis.

Yes, while I was sitting inside of the locker after being locked in there by some jocks, I was always so embarrassed of my penis size.

SUBJECT: With Vpxl I have gained 1.5 inches and appear quite
thick when flaccid.

MESSAGE: I have a solid 8 inches now
and my girlfriend calls me big boy.

I felt so sorry for the guy when I read that. ‘Big boy.' Whenever my girlfriend calls me that, I beat her….and I don't have a girlfriend.

Also, ‘Vpxl'…sounds awesome. I love pills without vowels in their names.

Also, I really want to look thick when flaccid. Girls are always judging me by what my penis looks like soft. So many missed opportunities…


Somebody call this guy. Wait…eleven digits? How'd you get eleven digits? Oh, your name is ‘Mrsmariam Aka', that's how.