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Portrayal of the Great British public in American media has improved lately. So when I see one of my countrymen letting the side down, it makes me want to club them over the head.
I'm back in school. Again. School by the way drives me fucking insane. For instance, who the fuck names these buildings? 'And on the right is the Dennis Anderson Grave Digger Monster Truck Hall.' Oh neato!
Bonfires are an American symbol of inefficient heating and circular gatherings. Here are the 8 types of guys who fuel these beer-pounding, philosophy-unleashing fire forums.
Everything about a classic bowling alley screams "unchanged." The decor is 70's, the musty smoke and shoe odor still penetrates, and the food worse than you could imagine.
"Hey, David," I say to the cashier manning the register at my all-time favorite gas station. I have a soft spot for gas stations for two reasons: nonjudgment and proximity.
These words have been egregiously overused, flogged to within a centimeter of their lives in general, and are altogether too self-consciously "poetic" and pretentious for further public consumption.
I was the ripe age of 16 when I first realized I could fly. I'd always suspected there was something different about me, but looking back it should have been more obvious.
Urinals, emotional maturity, and job responsibility - don't laugh, women, these are things we men have to deal with every day. Well, that and your misunderstanding of anything that's actually funny.
They say the first step to recovery is the admission of a problem. Well here it is, and here I am: I am addicted to Facebook. The following are the insurmountable consequences of trying to quit.
Holidays are supposed to be wondrous occasions to celebrate, but for the most part, a few come to mind that should be abolished and permanently etched off calendars worldwide.
Ever wondered what you're doing on this Earth? Not in a philosophical way, but in a why-didn't-your-mother-shank-your-fetus-with-a-broken-beer-bottle way? Well, your mother often wonders the same thing.
How far would you go to screw with your friends on Facebook? If you said steal your friend's identity and introduce their grandma to new sexual lingo, you're on the right track.