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One minute I was thinking, did I need to buy a bag of tangelos? But the next minute I was hearing the uplifting strains of your enchanting song.
Steal an intern’s idea and get a promotion for it? Buy them a piece of jewelry. The “hang loose” attitude of the puka shell never goes out of style.
I wanted to send an official cease and desist but my lawyer melted in 2016 so now I have to speak for myself.
Any path, regardless of magic type, has one result?---social isolation and perverse obsession with colorful vests.
You can’t read half the ingredients and might be suffocating a baby penguin with excess sodium monofluorophosphate, but at least you’re minty fresh.
“Are you sure Mr. Wayne needs these titanium bomb doors to his---uh, what’s this room for again?” one worker asked.
Our organic farm-to-table eatery is now also BYOM (Bring Your Own Meals). That’s right. You bring the food, we bring the vibes.
The first thing you will notice is that there are a lot of sober people at grocery stores. Can they tell you’re stoned?
It’s so easy! Even Adam Driver baked a humble pie when he came over my large home today.
Anyone know what jail Tommy is in? Maybe we could bring the reunion to him! Would be like the good ole days!
"I can’t even remember a time in my life when I did not love [dead rock star]." / "Shocked and saddened..."
I could tell he wasn’t like our past professors. There was a glimmer in his eye, a look that seemed to say: “I have had adventures with horses.”