Sleeping with Paris Hilton, Nicole Richie, and Black Bears

Voyeur IM >> 11-6-06

Werewolf Mikey: I basically figured out that SLEEP is a nightly payment for a loan on
life
Werewolf Mikey: you sleep 8 hours
courtjester5000: ;alsdffas
Werewolf Mikey: you get 16 waking hours
Werewolf Mikey: and blah blah you waste 30 years of your life asleep
Werewolf Mikey: etc.
courtjester5000: isnt that more like indentured servitude?
Werewolf Mikey: yeah something like that
courtjester5000: but i like the loan thing too
Werewolf Mikey: I concluded if 30 years is too much just stop sleeping
Werewolf Mikey: you get 2 weeks
Werewolf Mikey: until you die
Werewolf Mikey: or whatever
courtjester5000: or put a down payment
courtjester5000: like bears
Werewolf Mikey: what?
courtjester5000: a;lsdjasfd
Werewolf Mikey: AHHHH
Werewolf Mikey: hibernation
courtjester5000: yep
Werewolf Mikey: they pay up front
Werewolf Mikey: each year
courtjester5000: bears have strong cash flow
Werewolf Mikey: good credit
Werewolf Mikey: except for the North American Black Bear
courtjester5000: *YIKES*
courtjester5000: i refuse to go there
courtjester5000: ...because i might get ROBBED!
courtjester5000: ahaha
Werewolf Mikey: awerwerawe
Werewolf Mikey: bad neck of the woods
courtjester5000: can't see the forest for the teeth
Werewolf Mikey: stick to the shopping mauls
Werewolf Mikey: now you're just fishing for ideas
Werewolf Mikey: clawing out of the blue
courtjester5000: i havent got anything to chew on
Werewolf Mikey: well sink your teeth on this
Werewolf Mikey: Did you know polar bears are invisible to infrared?
Werewolf Mikey: Paris Hilton: That's Hot!
courtjester5000: wow, so are they part of our next spy attack?
courtjester5000: Nicole Richie: Did you know that rats are dirty?
Werewolf Mikey: talk about Sleeper cells
Werewolf Mikey: Nicole Richie borrows from her dad's credit card to go hit the white slopes
Werewolf Mikey: Avalanche
Werewolf Mikey: that's a lot of Blohan
Werewolf Mikey: And that's the skinny on celebrity gossip
courtjester5000: they dont call her LENDsay for nothing
courtjester5000: she'll give you the fat off her back just to keep you warm
Werewolf Mikey: Fur is out
courtjester5000: brrrr is in
Werewolf Mikey: Raw and pink is the new warm
courtjester5000: moist and wet is the new hot
Werewolf Mikey: Well Done!
courtjester5000: ao;idsfjasdf
courtjester5000: what a rare coincidence
Werewolf Mikey: Paris: That's moist and wet
courtjester5000: Nicole: That's so overdone
Werewolf Mikey: What did Nicole say when she went to Paris?
Werewolf Mikey: I dunno, ALASKA
Werewolf Mikey: oh, and "Damn this city is overrated"
courtjester5000: did JUNEAU that i talked to Paris?
Werewolf Mikey: Know, but I have seen nightvision shots of it.
Werewolf Mikey: absolutely gorgeous, but you still can't see the polar bears
courtjester5000: bear with me here, i can explain
courtjester5000: you see (or you can't see), because polar bears have clear fur
courtjester5000: that makes us polar opposites
Werewolf Mikey: well i'm not omnivore-potent
Werewolf Mikey: you're going to have to lay things out
Werewolf Mikey: *moves bearskin rug*
courtjester5000: it's just that she's such a carniv-WHORE
Werewolf Mikey: The Average American Slut can consume 3 pounds of man flesh in just under an
hour
Werewolf Mikey: *stomach growls*
courtjester5000: when an AAS talks to me about doing her best, i call it "Operation Deep
Throat"
Werewolf Mikey: angry grizzly tears paris a new one
Werewolf Mikey: but she patches it up with her sex tape
courtjester5000: -this just in on the scholarly tabloid
Werewolf Mikey: Woman vs. Beast
courtjester5000: man vs. yeast
Werewolf Mikey: I didn't know she was a cubs fan
courtjester5000: ya, she's always been a chick-ag-HO
Werewolf Mikey: climbing up the totem pole
courtjester5000: brb
Werewolf Mikey: *only able to carry 100 lbs back with you*

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