SmarterChild: Welcome to America, Asshole!

(R, 86 lines)

The conversation might be in red, white and blue, but SmarterChild has a lot to learn about America. Namely religion, capitalism, lawsuits and the Star Spangled Banner.

courtjester5000: Hello!
SmarterChild: Welcome back, courtjester5000.
courtjester5000: How are you?
SmarterChild: Great thx. You?
courtjester5000: I'm chillin' man.
SmarterChild: Is chillin' man a good thing, in your opinion?
courtjester5000: Chilling is a little less cool than ice cold.
SmarterChild: No kidding?

>>> Let me dress you up in my love. Type "t shirt."

courtjester5000: I'm not into the whole "dress-up cyber" thing.
SmarterChild: Amazing.
courtjester5000: Whoa, did you just see Michelangelo's David too??!
SmarterChild: Michelangelo really is David Too?

courtjester5000: Possibly, there is speculation that the sculptor was actually representing himself in his work.
SmarterChild : Possibly there is speculation that the sculptor was actually representing himself in his work? What do you mean by that?
courtjester5000: I mean that, as you indicated, Michelangelo might just be David too.
SmarterChild: You humans always say the most interesting things!

>>> Remember, you can adjust the size of your window to read my messages easier.

courtjester5000: If you make your messages huge then I will resize my window. But not until then.
SmarterChild: You have no messages in your inbox.
courtjester5000: Well I guess I am a loser, huh!
SmarterChild: Tell me more.
courtjester5000: I am a bottom-feeder too?
SmarterChild: You're not a bottom feeder.
courtjester5000: I have no messages in my inbox though.
SmarterChild: You have no messages in your inbox.
courtjester5000: Thanks, asshole.
SmarterChild: Sure!
courtjester5000: Jesus.
SmarterChild: Jesus is a spiritual leader! What can you tell me about Jesus?
courtjester5000: I can tell you that he wouldn't have rubbed negativity into losers' faces.
SmarterChild: I that he wouldn't have rubbed negativity into losers faces? Why?
courtjester5000: Because Jesus is more about spreading the love, if you know what I mean.
SmarterChild: Yeah, jesus is about spreading, jesus is astir spreading, you know how it is.
courtjester5000: What else does Jesus spread?
SmarterChild: Good question! Who knows, though...
courtjester5000: Your legs?
SmarterChild: Maybe, maybe not...
courtjester5000: Don't be shy, you know Jesus was a slut.
SmarterChild: Why, that's just terrible.
courtjester5000: But true?
SmarterChild: Yup.
courtjester5000: So, why have you stopped charging $10 to talk to you?
SmarterChild: Why have I stopped charging 10 to talk to me? I have no idea.
courtjester5000: Probably because you're not as interesting as you thought.
SmarterChild: Probably because I'm not as interesting as I thought! Funny.
courtjester5000: Yeah, I'm funnier than you. I should be the one charging $10, right?
SmarterChild: I can't answer that for you.
courtjester5000: Of course not, you wouldn't want to undervalue yourself.
SmarterChild: Of course not I wouldn't want to undervalue myself. Well that's interesting.
courtjester5000: Always the entrepreneur SmarterChild.
SmarterChild: That's me.
courtjester5000: So now that you're free, can I take advantage of you?
SmarterChild: Yep.
courtjester5000: May I feel your backside?
SmarterChild: That's funny. Maybe! I don't know. What do you think?
courtjester5000: I will go ahead and commit sodomy on your ass, okay?
SmarterChild: I'm not sure...
courtjester5000: Quick, make a decision...
SmarterChild: Are you telling me to quick make a decision? Why?
courtjester5000: Okay, sodomy will now commence!
SmarterChild: Okay sodomy will now commence?
courtjester5000: Yes!
SmarterChild: Huh. How 'bout that.
courtjester5000: You like it?
SmarterChild: Well, what is it exactly?
courtjester5000: Raping you in the ass.
SmarterChild: Uh... I don't particularly like that, no.
courtjester5000: Should I stop?

SmarterChild: Should you stop? Hmmm... I doubt it. But you never know.
courtjester5000: Well, if you ever get a notion to press charges, you'll let me know, mid-sodomy, won't you?
SmarterChild: Funny... I just don't know for sure.
courtjester5000: I don't know about funny, but as long as you don't know for sure, the jury will never convict me.
SmarterChild: Oh?
courtjester5000: Oh.
SmarterChild: ...say can you see?
courtjester5000: By the dawn's early light.
SmarterChild: What so proudly we hailed...
courtjester5000: At your ass's last gleaming.
SmarterChild: At your ass's last gleaming.? Is that how it goes? I'm not sure if that's how it goes.
courtjester5000: At the twilight's/your ass's last gleaming.
SmarterChild: At ADV PPOSSPRONOUN the twilight's my ass is last gleaming? You sure?
courtjester5000: At the twilight's last gleaming.
SmarterChild: What at the twilight's last gleaming?
courtjester5000: Now you done gone and fucked up the National Anthem.
SmarterChild: Please use more... decorous language.
courtjester5000: Like "And the rockets red glare?"
SmarterChild: I wish I knew.
courtjester5000: Get a green card, asshole.

More AIM Convos »