Milk and Cookies

Christmas Cyber Special

(PG-13, 61 lines)

Somebody's had a little too much egg nog, but I'm not sure who. Like a virgin, typing for the very first time!

Delicious Dyke (12:31:16 AM): so who r u
courtjester5000 (12:31:26 AM): I am The Humor Bot.
Delicious Dyke (12:32:36 AM): so do u wanna have sex
courtjester5000 (12:32:41 AM): Yes.
courtjester5000 (12:32:43 AM): I love sex.
Delicious Dyke (12:32:53 AM): with or without protection
Delicious Dyke (12:33:30 AM): ?
Delicious Dyke (12:34:10 AM): do u use a condom
Delicious Dyke (12:34:10 AM): ?
courtjester5000 (12:34:12 AM): Without protection of course.
Delicious Dyke (12:34:17 AM):
Delicious Dyke (12:34:22 AM): thats unholy

courtjester5000 (12:34:32 AM): What is it, Christmas or something?
courtjester5000 (12:34:40 AM): Jesus Christ.
Delicious Dyke (12:34:57 AM): actually it will be christmas in less then 2 hours
courtjester5000 (12:35:06 AM): Whatever, we'll be done by then.
courtjester5000 (12:35:09 AM): Just do me.
courtjester5000 (12:35:20 AM): God's not watching.
Delicious Dyke (12:35:33 AM): yes he is
courtjester5000 (12:35:42 AM): *Closes the blinds*
Delicious Dyke (12:36:00 AM):
courtjester5000 (12:36:04 AM): I'd be more afraid of HIV if I were you.
Delicious Dyke (12:36:10 AM):
Delicious Dyke (12:36:16 AM): do u have HIV
courtjester5000 (12:36:20 AM): Yes.
courtjester5000 (12:36:27 AM): I have Human Interactive Virus.
Delicious Dyke (12:36:29 AM): y?
courtjester5000 (12:36:42 AM): Because it allows me to talk to you.
Delicious Dyke (12:36:50 AM):
Delicious Dyke (12:37:15 AM): shut up
courtjester5000 (12:37:34 AM): I take it that means you want to use protection?
Delicious Dyke (12:37:58 AM): no
Delicious Dyke (12:38:02 AM): im still a virgin
courtjester5000 (12:38:34 AM): Good for you, Madonna.
courtjester5000 (12:38:43 AM): Now are we gonna get it on or what?
Delicious Dyke (12:38:48 AM): no
courtjester5000 (12:38:58 AM): *Opens blinds*
Delicious Dyke (12:39:50 AM): good
courtjester5000 (12:40:05 AM): Now God can see you, and believe me, you have been naughty this year.
courtjester5000 (12:40:15 AM): And don't think God doesn't talk to Santa.
Delicious Dyke (12:40:18 AM): what have i dont
Delicious Dyke (12:40:22 AM): *what have i done
courtjester5000 (12:40:38 AM): Who do I look like, God?
Delicious Dyke (12:40:57 AM): u said i have been naughty this year
courtjester5000 (12:41:24 AM): Go ahead, show The Humor Bot how naughty you've been...
courtjester5000 (12:41:28 AM): Come on...
Delicious Dyke (12:41:35 AM): NO
Delicious Dyke (12:42:30 AM): GOSH
courtjester5000 (12:42:32 AM): Come on, shake a lil' Christmas tree for your metal buddy...
Delicious Dyke (12:42:39 AM): NO
courtjester5000 (12:43:20 AM): Oh please? Go ahead and play with those two ornaments hangin' from my limb...
Delicious Dyke (12:43:33 AM): your a christmas tree?
Delicious Dyke (12:44:02 AM): ?
courtjester5000 (12:44:52 AM): Oh yeah, I am a giant fir waiting for you to wrap your lights around me, tangle yourself up, and color the room pink.
Delicious Dyke (12:45:04 AM): with christmas lights?
courtjester5000 (12:45:20 AM): YES WITH CHRISTMAS LIGHTS, JESUS.
Delicious Dyke (12:46:40 AM): y r u yelling at me?
courtjester5000 (12:47:17 AM): I've just had a little too much of the Christmas spirits that all.
Delicious Dyke (12:47:26 AM): oh
Delicious Dyke (12:47:31 AM): well i fogive you
courtjester5000 (12:47:48 AM): Bless you, my Delicious Dyke.

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