My Child Finally Stole from Me My Last Vestige of Coolness, My Spotify Wrapped
What’s the point of listening to obscure music if no one knows your doing it?
Tag: Parents
Clark Kent, We Have Updated Your Ancestry DNA Results!
Our new, improved algorithm now reports that you are: 99.9% not of the human genome <1% Pacific Islander
An Art Museum Presents: A Retrospective of Work Made by Your Aunt Who’s into Mysticism
Created over a career spanning the past four decades, but really only the past four years after she came back from that trip to Sedona.
A Tourism Brochure for [YOUR HOMETOWN]
Whether you're traveling to us for our illustrious corporate office complex or our fine lack of sidewalks, we guarantee an enjoyable stay.
Horror Movie Fate or Ways My Italian-American Mother Thinks I Risk Accidental Death, Which Is Lurking Around Every Corner?
- That cut is going to get infected - Fuel leak recall from a car I don’t own
Things I Mistakenly Thought Would Be Helpful During Our Baby’s Delivery Process
A pretty solid memory of that "Boy Meets World" episode where Cory’s mom gives birth to his younger brother.
Terms and Conditions for Dad Taking His Shirt Off This Summer
Dad may not get a little sun. Dad may not “air dry.” Dad may not play his belly like a bongo.
Announcing Our New Human
Heather was a total warrior throughout. Every time I saw what she was going through, I was in total awe. Like… Wow. Women are strong.
15 Things Your WASP Mother-In-Law and Paris Hilton Have in Common
- They both went to boarding school - They wish people would just calm down about the socioeconomic divide
We Do Not Sit Young Families Under Hulk’s Penis
Some things just can’t be fixed with free waffle fries.
Introducing the Fantasy Card Game, “Mothers: The Maddening”
Players assume the role of tired wizards and cast spells, and summon creatures to do their bidding and help fold laundry.
This Is a Test of the LAST NERVE Emergency Alert System
The alert system will be preceded by two sharp tones — "Hey! HEY!" — followed by "Listen, Buster."