I’m Queen Elsa from the “Frozen” Broadway Show and I’m Here to Announce Your Company’s Hiring Freeze
Thank goodness I’m still booking kindergarten graduations and Mormon cosplay through Cameo.
Thank goodness I’m still booking kindergarten graduations and Mormon cosplay through Cameo.
I acknowledge that I can change my sweatpants if I want to or I can wear the same ones every day forever and only I have the power to choose.
Should you fall ill, the university has shored up our reserve of adjuncts. They will easily be able to take on your classes in an emergency.
If anyone’s screen-sharing with a cop, it won’t be long until you’re keeping six feet away from the living. Screen-sharers are dead to me.
Works hard but makes no money / Loves avocado and salmon breakfasts / Obsessed with filtered water / Goes on many long, sad walks
You may be wondering: Mr. Krueger, are nightmare factories really "essential?" Especially during a pandemic when real life mimics nightmares?
Mr. Bingley - Headed back to his parents mansion the moment shit went down. Makes parody videos in front of his pool. Tanned—like, SO tanned.
Lists of songs to help with the sheltering process: Clearly the goal is to convey the refined but also insider-quirky tastes of the poster.
You have duly earned those A̶’̶s̶,̶ ̶w̶h̶i̶c̶h̶ ̶s̶t̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶A̶c̶c̶o̶m̶p̶l̶i̶s̶h̶m̶e̶n̶t̶ P’s, which stand for Probably Above Par.
Eternity. Did you catch that? That’s two months times infinity. Let that rattle around in your thick skull for a moment.
Yes, sir, the pharmacist is here, but we don’t use that word. Rajiv is our Chef de Prescriptions.
She is certainly allowed to raise her eyebrows when you admit you’re not seeing anyone, despite the fact that your city is still sheltering in place.