A Wallet Laments Getting No Ass in Quarantine
Week after week, the routine never varies. Tim wakes up, reaches for idiotic iPhone, eats Cheez-Its, and sits on his sweet ass without me.
Comedy Writing
I’m Queen Elsa from the “Frozen” Broadway Show and I’m Here to Announce Your Company’s Hiring Freeze
Thank goodness I’m still booking kindergarten graduations and Mormon cosplay through Cameo.
Attn Witches: Our Midsummer Coven Has Been Rescheduled for Tuesday, Nov 3
Disinfect your broom, too. We recommend a homemade flying potion made of opium poppies, spotted red mushrooms, and toad skins.
I Don’t Need a Stinking Dove to Tell Me When It’s Safe to Get Off This Godforsaken Ark
That mewing and hawing you’re hearing on the upper deck isn’t the 4 PM slop feeding. It’s a protest!
Subscription Boxes of the Wild West
We accept many forms of currency, including gold bars, silver pesos, and buried treasure, provided it is accompanied by a map.