Our eldest son, who fancies himself an art dealer of dick pics, has found his avocation stuffing pimentos into green olives. Someone's gotta do it.
In Who-ville, critical thinking is not valued as a trait. No, rumor and hearsay are given far more weight.
It pains me to think that the childhood I’ve carefully constructed for Trevin could come crashing down, all due to the ramifications of your bullying.
My mom mailed me back my matching pajama set with a note, “Don’t bother wearing our family Christmas pajamas unless you ask for something fun."
5 Episodes of “DuckTales” Where Winter’s First Snowfall Coincided with Uncle Scrooge Explaining to His Grandnephews That Because They Were Not Human, God Would Not Welcome Them into the Kingdom of Heaven When They Died
Season 1, Episode 45 - Raiders of the Lost Harp: When Uncle Scrooge Bemoans That All His Riches Cannot Afford Him a Seat in God’s Kingdom
Flaky GPS will accidentally lead him to shithole town’s all too familiar old bar, where he'll bump into the one that got away.
I noticed that you already posted those vacation photos online, but the evidence of just how wealthy your family is magneted to my fridge is a treat!
Enjoy this quaint seasonal attraction while skillfully dodging pesky shop attendants!
I’m just a Pumpkin Spice Latte, standing in front of a customer, asking them to love me for more than 55 days a year...
"Karma Chameleon": A gay man falls in love with a faithless reptile who comes and goes, comes and goes.
A friend finds an aggressive dog hiding under a car. She asks if we will take him in temporarily. I know I need to swallow my fear, so I say yes.
Dad’s old tennis sneakers: You dated him in college when he wore these sneakers and you seemed to like them just fine back then.