A Principal’s Tough Conversation with His Coolest Student
"You fielded eighteen promposals before February. That's a county record."
Tag: Basketball
Who’s the Ultimate GOAT: Jordan, LeBron, or These Baby Goats Standing on the Backs of People Doing Yoga?
Michael and LeBron do not like mountain climbing. They’re just not any good at it. Conversely, Baby Goat can scale a mountain like nothing.
Quarterly Review
I thought this was a quarter but it’s actually a POG. I traded it to my friend Dennis for a real quarter.
Weighing All of LeBron James’ Possible Moves
Washington: By successfully recruiting James, the Washington Generals could finally have a shot at taking down those damn Harlem Globetrotters.
Dennis Rodman Worries His Friends Are Hanging Out Without Him
Honestly? I should get the Peace Prize. I started this friendship, but whatever, no one seems to care and Donny will take credit, yet again.
Breaking Down the Trump Administration’s Moves and Their Impact on the Tanking Effort
While not a standout diplomat by any means, there was always the fear of Tillerson putting together a semi-competent performance.
Five Moves the Trump Administration Should Have Made at the NBA Trade Deadline
Add Kyrie Irving's ball handling skills to his Betsy Devos-level production (from a disbelief in modern science standpoint), and you've got a title contender.
Requests for My Make-A-Wish Bachelor Party
Dear Make-A-Wish Foundation, I've recently been given three weeks to live. Because I am 12 and have not yet experienced a bachelor party, here is my list of requests.
6 Reasons Your Ugly-Cry at This Basketball Game is Ruining My Life
Going for that peak-psycho ugly-cry in a public place surrounded by crazy sports fans probably isn't going to score you any "girlfriend points."
Post-Game Press Conference for Game 1 of the Offensive Team Name Basketball Association Championship
The Cleveland Noble Savages defeated the Jackson City Quadroons 116-110 in Game 1 of the OTNBA Championship. Here is the post-game conference transcript.