The latest posts from all humor columns. Everyday Artists | PIC Newspaper | First Lecture | Simon Says
I'm sure there are things in this world superior to Carly Foulkes, the new hot T-Mobile chick in pink. I can't think of any, but they probably exist.
How do you explain a group of 18-60 assorted teenagers from California dispensing hardcore, destructive rap antics to thousands of American youth? New age terrorism.
Being in a long distance relationship is a lot of work. Especially for a lazy girl like me, who likes doing the bare minimum just to get by in every other aspect in life.
I like everything about sluts: their slutty clothes, their slutty conversation, their slutty company... the whole slutty package. I am strongly pro-slut.
Unfortunately for you, your underpants (if you're wearing them), and those around you (if there are people around), you just shat yourself. Don't worry, we've all been there before.
I say we try our hardest to convince both polarities of the political landscape to actually have some sense. And the one issue we can all agree makes the most difference is education.
I have developed a system to determine if you are having a genuinely bad day; a system to isolate the darkest grays to charcoal blacks.
People have said to me, numerous times, that my standards are too high. I beg to differ. I can't help it that 98% of the men I've gone out with just weren't up to par.
Listen, people of Detroit, I know you think having a statue of Robocop is really cool, but I have a dark vision of the future! Robocop shall be the seed of your undoing!
We've all been there, some of us more than others. It's that moment just after doing something where you realize YOU are actually the asshole, not the other person.
Today, officials at UIA announced the annual winner of their "Award for Best Paper in Aristotelian Achievement: Specifically, The Greatest Achievement in a Sarcastic Paper About Meta-Stuff."
Rewind the clock an undisclosed time when KC and his Organs only knew 15 years of life and attended Catholic high school, and Junk's boner was out in force.