Never buy any other flavor of powered drink mix except lemonade.

I tell myself this every time I go to the grocery store. It doesn’t matter if it’s the Kool-Aid brand or some knock off like Flavor-Ade, Aid de cool, Country time or government drink mix.

Lemonade. That’s all I like. Pink lemonade is permissible, but that’s it. I know I’m right. I always am. Why then don’t I listen to myself?

In my kitchen drawer, I have a packet of Artic Green Apple and Watermelon Cherry. I will never drink these. Why the hell did I buy them? I knew better.

“But, Beech, the Artic apple is white powder and then it turns green-“

I don’t care. I don’t fucking care. This isn’t a science experiment. This is thirst quenching. I like lemonade and that’s all I like.

All this proves to me is that I’m right all the time and if I just listen to myself all the time, I will always be right.