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Going forward, we’ll tap into the pre-made horror of adolescence. A time the healthiest among you have repressed.
Are you familiar with the phrase, “Living your best life?” Do you think that’s what is going on in here?
I’m 89 years old and I’ve literally never seen Heimlich's Maneuver happen, and I’ve eaten at hundreds of sloppy lobster restaurants.
What did any silverfish ever do to you? We’re barely able to stop ourselves from disintegrating into dust.
Everyone in the house could be pissing at the exact same time, which is something you could do if you wanted.
When Tom first started playing, there were no 5th downs or 100-yard field goals. And every game took place on Earth, where gravity was a huge factor.
We realize it’s atypical to ban someone who hasn’t violated our Terms of Service, we strongly believe that your personality and general vibe justify an exception.
"This is gonna be huge," I whispered to myself, flattening the various cold cuts dangling from my body.
That’s right, the book's value at auction is thirty dollars without the Babadook.
Does free will exist, and did I employ it when purchasing this quirky pair of binoculars? Do I even like binoculars?
I would also like to offer to pay for the damages to the building from when I ripped a meat hook out of the ceiling and swung it around my head.
What type of web is this supposed to be? Certainly not a classic orb web, or an on-trend funnel web.