Approaching Being Buried Alive with a Business Mindset
When a tortuous, claustrophobic death rears its ugly head, winners HUSTLE HARDER.
Tag: Satire
Your Deductive Reasoning Is Ruining This Brunch, Mr. Holmes
Your constant, unprovoked deductive reasoning is making the other guests uncomfortable. There is no mystery, Holmes. Just mimosas.
“Would You Mind If I Picked Your Brain?” From a Zombie on LinkedIn
As a current job seeker, I would love nothing more than to find out what exactly those thoughts are in that big, juicy brain of yours.
Paul @Corinthians
@Corinthians Love is patient love is kind. It does not filter, it does not crop, it is not thirsty #Paul #RunTellThat
When You Say “Bite Me” to a Solicitation
Your comment was “Bite me.” Since you did not check any of the five action boxes we provided, we are not sure what action to take.
A Template for Confessing Your Infidelity and/or Announcing You Are the New Pope
I think we can all agree: it is odd how a single (accidental text message / vote with my fellow Cardinals) can change the course of history
Candy Corn Tastes like Cheap Trash and That’s Why I Like It
A handful of those tri-colored diabetic nightmares leave me physically ill with my head pulsing in pain. And guess what? I’m into it.
That There’s Oil. Texas Tea. Economy Slime. Hot Rockolate.
Iced lava. Coal brew. There Was Blood, A Long Time Ago. Dinosaur Smoothie. Tyrannosaurus rocks. Triceratopped off.
My Job Is Modeling Counterfeit Fashion and It’s the Most Rewarding Job in the World
The lady perched by a theme-park Eiffel Tower, clasping a suspiciously shiny handbag, and hoping security doesn’t notice she jumped the gate, is me!
90 Years Later, Universal’s “Frankenstein” Remains a Poignant Tale of How Fucked Up It Would Be If There Was a Guy Whose Head Was Perfectly Flat on Top
Even today, when I see his head, my mind goes wild with possibilities, envisioning all the dirty dishes that I could set down upon it.
My Favorite Shirt Has Leatherface Giving You the Finger
Suit and tie? Business casual? I think the Leatherface on my t-shirt will let you know what I think about them.
Reviews of Baba Yaga’s Bed and Breakfast
The hostess had my children help her out in the kitchen this morning, chopping vegetables and stirring a great big soup pot.