Satire | Page 251 | Points in Case

Tag: Satire

trump: jeff if you hang up on me i will have to talk directly to your— (jeff bezos hangs up)

The liberals, they're wrong, we can't ban guns. Even if we made guns illegal, someone would reinvent guns and just call them something else.

Okay, I know there’s “a lot” of blood. Yes, I know it’s all over the wool carpeting we had installed last week.

Fortnite has taught me that silence is an effective strategy. And my new best bros, FragStewie_247 and BonerTauntz agree.

If that’s not bad enough, the elk start head-butting each other out of sheer horniness for all to see. It’s like living in a frat house.

My therapy center is called "Hammer Out Your Dance Demons," and is funded exclusively by me and by none of my family’s $200+ million fortune.

I’m better off without you. You are so frustrating and judgmental. I have never done anything to wrong you, but yet, you still can’t stand me.

Expect showers outside. Please keep following the ban on indoor showers; it’s hard to believe it's been 20 years since the Great Water War.

2. How does Iago describe jealousy? "The green-eyed monster" or "Our neighbor Brad's stupid, big muscles?"

We then cut to the same location to view the disturbing spectacle of grotesque businessmen carving up our dead Bill and eating him for supper.

The Philadelphia Museum of Art, somehow, contains a large painting of me having my ass beat with a hammer, wielded by a man who I have never met.

“My moon is in Sagittarius, so I shut down emotionally to cope with stress! I told you that on Christmas after I punched that mall Santa!”