I’m Queen Elsa from the “Frozen” Broadway Show and I’m Here to Announce Your Company’s Hiring Freeze
Thank goodness I’m still booking kindergarten graduations and Mormon cosplay through Cameo.
Tag: Music
Diary Entries from the Season Bob Dylan Coached My Son’s Little League Team
Instead of wearing baseball caps, Coach Dylan has all the kids wearing these weird old hats he found at a garage sale.
The Other 45 Ways to Leave Your Lover That Paul Simon Didn’t Want You to See
Be too into board games, James / Finally say how you really feel, Neil / Act like a slob, Rob / Cut them out of the will, Bill
Now That’s What I Call Music! COVID-19
Unpopulated Island in the Sun / Stayin' Alive Until Extra Ventilators and Testing Becomes Available / Blinded by the Light from My Computer Screen
Jury Duty Is Rebranding as Justice Festival
As you enter the courthouse, you will get a trendy wristband. This unlocks special access to the “VIP Pit” also known as the “Enormous Waiting Area.”
A Letter of Appreciation for “One Headlight” by the Wallflowers
People will call you a monster, and in a way, they’ll be correct: you are a monster---a monster fucking hit.
Rolling Stones Song, or Just Another Effect of Climate Change?
Fires Ablaze / Rain Fall Down / Carbon Dioxide High / Winter / Where Are All The Bees, Baby? / Another Polar Vortex
Austin Visa Application for SXSW Attendees
1. The dammed-up Colorado River running through Austin is called... A) Town Lake B) Lady Bird Lake C) A lake? Sure as hell don’t look like a lake
How to Properly Care for Your Newly Adopted Introvert
Bring your Introvert upwards of 50 books per week, as It will devour them. Often, this species builds small huts or thrones with these books.
My 2020 Self-Care Routine
I read an article called “Ten Reasons Why Crying is Good for You” and shed a few tears. For health reasons. I wonder what, exactly, flavonoids are.
Kaplan & The Knot Present: LSAT Logic Games Prep, Wedding Edition
Practice Set 1: Seating Chart Chaos: You and your fiance must seat 7 members of your bridal party (all of whom went to college together) at one table.
Next-Gen Car Features for Generally Irritable Drivers
To keep you safe on long interstate drives, Mother's Gap Lane Assist simulates a choking gasp from your mother’s throat when you veer out of lane.