Hold on Boys, I Can’t Break This Ancient Curse without My Tank Top!
You know what it looks like. It’s the same tank top I wear every time we get together to defeat an age-old evil or combat a monstrous hellion.
Tag: Movies and TV
Unanswered 90’s Hollywood Want Ads
Hapless criminals looking for qualified candidate to provide wakeup service to a suburban Chicago family with an early morning flight.
I Am the Orc from Your Favorite Movies
I played an orc in the Lord of the Ring movies. If you look closely, I am the grayish one with the teeth coming out in all directions from my face.
Hollywood’s Historical Bio-Pics of Forbidden Love
Betsy & Benji, Sewing the Body Electric: Betsy Ross's flag-sewing prowess inspired warriors to greatness. Benjamin Franklin's magnetism was electric.
What Your Favorite Comedian Says About You, A Straight White Man
Hannibal Buress: You learned what feminism is from "Broad City," and you’re not 100% on board with it yet.
How to Make Him Come So Hard He Turns into Al Pacino from “Scent of a Woman” and Yells “HOOAH!”
Next thing you know you’ll be tangoing in the sheets yelling “HOOAH!” like the blind retired army veteran Al Pacino won the Oscar for portraying.
House Hunters: Underground Bunker Edition
A bunker in a cute town with lots of shops and restaurants would be more than fine. Ideally, it would be a community with a high walkability score.
As an Old and Bitter Movie Critic, I’m Finding Third-Act Problems in My Own Life
My life—the sophomore outing by parents William and Eloise Cunningham—begins confidently enough in suburban Nebraska.
Rejected Chapter Summaries From “Stranger Things – Season 3”
The gang meets at the gym as they each try to punch the hottest boy in town. Curly Girl has a touching feminist discussion with mom about journalism.
Manifesto of the Streamable Content Commune
The Streamable Content Commune is a community dedicated to subverting this oppressive system by bringing together people who share values & passwords.
Interactions Adam Levine Has With People Who Aren’t the Country Judge from “The Voice”
Eating brie, Adam, his wife, friends close and warm—it’s couples night. "No I won’t take my shirt off right here! No!" Adam takes his shirt off.
How “Reservoir Dogs” Helped Me Overcome the Generational Trauma of My Snitch Family
The men and women in my family took to snitching. My grandfather was known as the Irish Elvis because he would sing to the cops about anything.