List: 7 Cactuses Who Could Beat the Golden State Warriors
After playing four straight championships and winning three, fans are asking, "Is there a cactus who could even come close to beating the Warriors??"
Tag: Sports
Two Sports-Talkers Talking Sports Talk
HELLOOOOO! Hope you brought the peanut butter, because that my friend was a mouthwatering jam!
My Girlfriend Tries to Break Up With Me, A One-Off Character Who Needs to Quickly Deliver a Lot of Exposition
"Is this because you just lost your job? We’ve been through this, you’re an excellent reporter and they had no right to fire you! You won a Pulitzer!"
Master Template for Every Championship Sports Interview Ever Given
"I set a goal [NUMBER OF YEARS THE TEAM HAS BEEN TERRIBLE] ago and I was determined to give it [CLICHÉ FROM MOTIVATIONAL KITTEN CALENDAR]."
4 Times the Winter Olympics Tried to Boost Ratings By Exhuming a Classic Movie Star’s Corpse
Millions tuned in to watch Jimmy Stewart’s body rocket down the mountain, reaching a top speed of 90 MPH and securing the bronze.
Eight Reasons Why 2019 is Going to Be a Big Year for My Hometown’s Minor League Baseball Team, The Woodborough Egg Boys
The Tar Pits Behind Third Base Have Been Filled In: The nostalgic need not worry; the sickening smell of sulfur still permeates the entire stadium.
We’re Glad You’re Enjoying the Game, But Would You Mind Disabling Your Shot Blocker?
We understand your concern with protecting the rim at all costs, but maybe you could just disable the shot blocker on one part of the court?
What Your NCAA Bracket Champion Says About You
Cincinnati Bearcats: You’ve watched a tournament game in a strip club. Iowa Hawkeyes: You lost money investing in Matthew Whittaker’s toilet company.
List: A Safety Guide for Your White Water Rafting Excursion
If you encounter a group of violent mountain people who threaten to harm you, please do not use your guide as a bargaining chip to secure freedom.
When It Comes to Waiting, I’m a Natural
I never look to see if the bus or train is coming. I never push the button more than once on elevators or at crosswalks.