This conversation took place in real time and was transcribed later.

Grant: This is my last 5 dollars. I can't buy weed with 5 dollars, so I'm going to buy a lotto ticket, win 20 dollars, and then buy weed.

Me: Yeah, that's not going to happen. Your luck sucks.

Grant: Yeah well I won't share the wealth when I win, so walk away.

Me: Well I'm the one with a car, plus I'm not smoking anyway right now.

Grant: Pussy.

Me: You want a ride to the gas station or not?

Grant: Pony up fa**ot we're leaving.

(At the gas station)

Grant: I want the 5 dollar bingo card. I gotta win me some weed money.

Cashier: Good luck with that.

Me: See, even the cashier doesn't believe in you.

Grant: Well fuck you both then. I don't need either of you. Well I need you because you own a car.

Me: Scratch the ticket.

Grant: 50 dollar winner fa**ots. I'm buying a quarter!

Me: No fucking way. Let me see that… I hate you so much.

Grant: Well this is just gods way of telling you that I'm just a better human being than you are in every single way.

Me: I hope you choke on smoke.

Grant: I hope you enjoy sobriety.

Me: Fuck, get in the car I'm taking you home.

I miss weed so much.