Sleep | Points in Case

Tag: Sleep

Blathering on about one’s own dream is one of life’s greatest pleasures, a kind of psychological masturbation that satisfies our basest desire.

Get Out of Bed: In this first phase, caution is the name of the game. I can't take any risks that could lead to a second wave of weekend lethargy.

My terrifying, needle-wielding aunt who breaks into my bedroom nightly, holds me down, and then gives me thousands of vaccines while I'm sleeping.

Let all your worries, cares, and worldly possessions flow away from your body… and into a rental truck parked outside...

She laughed, but do you think maybe deep inside she thought you were an idiot? Nah... Probably not. Anyway, no reason to hash it out at 2:32 AM!

Day Two: To smooth things over with my girlfriend, I write "You'll always be my Number One worm" in gummies on the kitchen floor.

Stoned college kids convincing themselves it’s really everyone else who is stoned / A yawn that never ends / Vomit splashing into a toilet

Twinkle, twinkle little star, / How I wonder who I are. / I ain’t no saint, or rabbi, / But that don’t make me a bad guy.

An essential precaution against these hazardous situations is making sure that you’re walking back toward your house before getting out on the road.

By the end of the semester, you should be able to verbally sedate your significant others for an entire dinner conversation.

Our friendly staff will welcome you in the lobby, where we’ll happily carry your bags for you. Look at you pretending you’re about to help!

Billy, look at your mother! Tell me you hid the Milanos with Dark Chocolate Filling! Oh, my child... How could you?