How Parents Set Babysitters Up for Failure
As a community service, allow me to dive into some hour-by-hour trends I’ve noted on the typical Friday night babysit, with a few tips for dealing with those trends.
Tag: Jobs
Just Because I Hallucinated While Serving You Chinese Mall Food Doesn’t Make You Better Than Me
The moment you mispronounced "Szechuan chicken," all of reality froze as if someone had hit the pause button on existence.
7 Incredible But True Dog Facts That Won’t Save You From the Completely Unforeseeable Collapse of the Coal Industry in the US
Incredible but surprisingly true dog facts that will in no way whatsoever save you from the fallout of the coal mine closing in your community.
10 Ways to Use the Holidays to Harness the Power You Can’t Get From Your Horrible Job
A holiday party is the perfect opportunity to quiet your anxiety and self-loathing by making others say "How does she do it?!"
Pete’s Wood Employee of the Month: Mr. Hymen Clit
Mr. Hymen Clit serves as custodian here at Pete's Wood, the only lumber furniture factory utilizing only the biggest and hardest wood for superior furniture.
When I Started This Business, I Never Imagined Working for Myself
I had forgotten one important factor that may determine the outcome of my business: when it comes to work, I suffer from dissociative identity disorder.
Did You Not Wash Your Hands After Pooping on the Boss’ Desk?
Gary, I've called you into HR today not because you defecated onto Mr. Peters’ desk, but because you clearly didn’t even make an attempt to wash your hands afterward.
Guitar Shop Man Doesn’t Want You to Buy a Guitar
Why does Guitar Shop Man seem like he's on a mission to thwart you from buying a new guitar? Because he's scared you'll become a pro and crowd the space even more.
Business Networking: The Road to Nowhere
Thirty years after the deluge of college advice to "network network network," I conclude that networking is overrated, intractable, and something to be avoided.
Dear High School Class of 2015: Raptors Will Take Your Jobs
Raptors are not just dim-witted lizards anymore. They can open doors, hack your phone, and steal your car. And they're threatening to takie your jobs right now.
Job Interview with a Damaged Goods Employee
Honestly, after thinking about it and coming in today…I don't think you guys want me. I just got out of a LONG relationship with my last company, and I'm just not ready.
9 Obituaries That Reinforce Terrible Career Choices
Tiffany "SURPRISE!" Johannasen loved creating internet garbage for tween readers, and counted "melting brains and ruining society" among two of her passions.