You were so busy pretending to be a British royal, you didn't even notice that your wife and kids left you and that she changed the Netflix password on her way out.
When he is not hauling freight, Thomas will lock himself inside of The Big Station and think about the damage he has done to our planet.
Which Quarantine Type Are You: Health Nut, Couch Potato, or 19th Century Working-Class British Child, Based on My Impression from BBC Period Dramas?
I’ve stayed in touch with friends by… A) Hosting non-alcoholic Zoom happy hours. B) FaceTiming an ex at 2AM. C) Spitting peas at my chum’s window.
I climbed in the window of that cottage over there and the lady inside screamed. I don't know why. There were no ghosts in there. I checked.
It is true that I carry a mobile phone, which I use to stay in touch with my grandchildren. It is not true that I use it to play Candy Crush.
Brady: Known as Balder & nicknamed the White or the Beautiful, Brady is the most attractive of the gods, and most popular since he started playing QB.
How did you hear about this opening? Indeed, LinkedIn, or National Inquirer?
Your years of unemployment in your home country put you at a distinct disadvantage. And we can find no official immigrant category of “prince.”
I have lived my entire adult life as if I were born in 1813 England as a gentlemanly Port Warden. And yet my uncle is the one called “old-fashioned.”
Next you’re going to tell me that you don’t remember William Molineux organizing prominent Whig meetups at the Old South Meeting House.
I caught your last prep school match against Groton, and let me be plain: you are a truly gifted combat juggler, a “once-in-a-century” talent.
Hapless criminals looking for qualified candidate to provide wakeup service to a suburban Chicago family with an early morning flight.