I Am Out of the Office, But Please Contact Me Anytime (Really, Anytime)
For urgent matters, please reach out to Gary Dilworth, who will bombard me with angry texts in all caps until I respond.
For urgent matters, please reach out to Gary Dilworth, who will bombard me with angry texts in all caps until I respond.
Have you been getting some emails that seem Phishy? This is PayPal, btw. The real PayPal. How can you know? You’ll get a gut feeling inside.
We hope this message finds you and your loved ones healthy and safe. (We hope you have other things going for you, like parents with substantial savings.)
The clients’ voicemails were mistakenly deleted, as the functions of the different button thingies had been forgotten.
Have you considered making me taller and more visually striking? Might be good for brand recognition.
Due to many frightful circumstances relating to galactic space evil, I must speak over discretely email.
I was hoping to catch up this week to discuss how our Product You’ve Never Heard Of can quadruple your annual revenue.
Yes!! Tell the whole department how unintuitive you find the system. Oh YES it’s been so hard for you to find your files since the software update.
Does this mean Santa's Workshop will close? Santa's Workshop will live on as a digital storefront competing with hundreds of counterfeiters.
Okay, just because you didn’t say “Rudolph” doesn’t mean you “protected my identity.” It sounds like you were very specific about the shiny nose.
I hope this level of detail gives you a clear understanding of the lengths that many of us would go to avoid any more forced, holiday-themed fun.
Hope everything's been going well for you! I know it's a little bonkers to keep following up, but you did say to keep nudging, so here I am!