I cannot help but feel like the law is on the side of the cold-blooded decapods of this world who travel willy-nilly from shell to shell.
I'm pre-approved for a dozen credit cards, but good luck getting to Wells Fargo without being eaten by robins.
It's me, the least popular character to break into your home and leave stuff in the name of celebration. Let me lay it out for you.
1 Peter 1:3: "Praise be to bunny Jesus who is always, like, twitching his little nose."
I’m the Actor Who Plays Chester Cheetah and I’m Tired of Being Type Cast as a Cheesy Snack-Food Obsessed Cool Dude
While I despised the overacting required for cartoonish behavior, I was a professional and delivered the performance asked of me.
You can spend a fortune on a professional decorator, or you can hire us, We Do It With Dogs.
- Sometimes the leader thinks they can fly. - Workers must work as fast as they can with barely any breaks.
Stock Consultant: Honestly, this feels more helpful than predicting the end of winter anyway.
Because Ayn Rand’s Birthday and Groundhog Day Overlap, You Are Now Trapped in an Endless Loop of Capitalism
Any attempts to unionize will bounce you to the beginning of your shift at your second job driving for Uber, over and over again.
If you’re used to other eateries in the area, you might be surprised by the cold, but we didn’t mind cuddling up.
Hamm from "Toy Story": Manufactured from plastic, Hamm should be the last option on anybody's transplant list.
Memory Like a Goldfish? I’ve Got a Memory as Long as the Time You’re Going to Spend in Hell for Trapping Me in This Bowl
Are you familiar with the phrase, “Living your best life?” Do you think that’s what is going on in here?