>>> About Last Night…
By staff writer Ali Wisch
November 23, 2005

When it comes to guys, you can usually narrow it down to three things: sports, sex, and beer. However, there are some things you might not know about the male that go beyond their favorite team, position, and alcoholic beverage. For your enjoyment, I present 25 things about guys you probably didn't know, didn't want to know, or didn't take the time to notice.

1. As much as you want to talk about past relationships, zip the lip. When you tell a guy you are still good friends with an ex, that translates to, “we still hook up occasionally.”

2. Always wait to hear how many people they've slept with before you reveal your numbers. Anything above 10 is generally considered slutty, and anything below 5 is generally considered a lie.

3. Every guy has one “dorky” hobby; some guys play computer games like Everquest, others build paper airplanes. While I know you're desperate to change them, let them have this one thing, it will keep them sane.

4. Guys like it when it's bare, you know where. “If a girl's got a nice box I'll go down on her anytime.” (Anthony, 19) If that doesn't say it, I don't know what does.

5. They don't like your drunken alter ego. If he's really nice he will hold your hair back while you puke, but you are still the girl who puked.

6. Never walk into the bathroom without knocking first, there are some things that guys just don't want us to see (or smell). If they are in there for more then 10 minutes you should wait about 20 before you walk through that door.

7. If you haven't heard the expression, it goes something like this, “Bros before hoes.” “Don't criticize a friend of your man unless he brings it up first.”
(Brian, 20)

8. Try not to go through their shit. Once you do, don't tell them.

9. Guys like compliments too. If you tell them you like their shirt, chances are they will remember and wear that shirt again.

10. If they smell like pot, they've probably been smoking. If they smell like booze, they've probably been drinking. Put your interrogation flashlight away.

11. They look at Internet porn.

12. If you approach it the right way, you can get any guy to watch Sex and the City with you.

13. They have probably hooked up with one of your friends, and if they haven't, they want to.

14. If a guy has small hands or feet, don't comment on it, unless you're prepared for an awkward situation.

15. If a guy asks you to chill, it's okay to bring a friend the first time—from then on, save the sidekick for parties and other social events.

16. They like getting head more than giving it.

17. A framed picture of yourself as a gift is creepy. Anything from Sharper Image should do the trick.

18. Some guys pee sitting down.

19. If they tell you they “already have a Beirut partner,” they don't want to hook up with you.

20. If a guy seems into you but doesn't act on it, there is a chance that one of his friends wants you.

21. Guys will silence your calls when they are a) At a sporting event, b) At the bar, or c) Hooking up with another girl.

22. If a guy's Facebook status says “single,” he is not your boyfriend.

23. Sometimes sports take priority over sex.

24. They don't want to hear about your period. Period.

25. “Guys like girls who are into religion, because it gives them something to believe in—and something to scream during sex.” (Justin Rebello, 22)