What if unicorns ran the world? Could such a wondrous time exist? I'm sure you ask yourself this every day. I know I do. A time of horses with horns and…well I guess that would really be the only change. But it would still be awesome.

If unicorns ran the world would they allow regular horses to stay? Would anyone care? If given the choice between a hornless horse and one with a horn who would choose a regular horse? It's just a fact.

While most people support the idea of a world run by horny horses, there are those who won't accept its crazy awesomeness. What are we to tell them to convince them of the truth? We tell them of a time when bad people can be poked on a moment's notice and where small buttons on a calculator are easily pressed. A time when as long as someone has an inkwell with them a document can be notarized instantly—assuming the unicorn signing the document is a notary official.

Is this a world we can afford to let slip through our fingers? No! The answer is no! It was rhetorical. We cannot give up on this dream. This horny dream. This very horny dream. Yeah, I used a double entendre. What of it? Oh, you think that's not witty? It's just trite? Well you're trite and your mother is ugly! Love unicorns!

*This PSA was paid for by the Society For Unicorn Awareness and Justice (SFUAAJ), the Fictional Animal League, by People Who Have One Pointy Horn On Their Heads Against Defamation (PWOPHOTHAD), and by Jon Stewart for some reason…I don't know why either…frankly I think he a closet unicorn lover, but no one knows that for sure.

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