Daily funny articles by seasoned comedy writers and fresh voices. Best of Year | Editors' Picks | People's Favorites | Satire | Guides | Observations | Stories
If I were spitballing names for an evil mountain, I feel like “Mount Doom” would be one of the first things I thought of.
No one does a mitral valve repair like Dr. F. He's brash, unpredictable, and thrives in the plush leather interior of the circulatory system.
"The Sixth Sense": Bruce Willis is clearly only getting close to this kid so he can bang his mom. Case closed.
Eternity. Did you catch that? That’s two months times infinity. Let that rattle around in your thick skull for a moment.
Look at the sick logo . It declares leadership but whispers I will stick you. It’s all about that Dragon Energy in 1476.
Instead of wearing baseball caps, Coach Dylan has all the kids wearing these weird old hats he found at a garage sale.
First there was a cluck-cluck here, then a cluck-cluck there, but soon my nightmares were filled with the cooings and cawings of the foulest fowl.
Yes, sir, the pharmacist is here, but we don’t use that word. Rajiv is our Chef de Prescriptions.
NotJeff: This password is great for anyone not named Jeff. Again though, please don’t actually use this password since it is on this list.
Oh, you didn’t think I was a "real" doctor? Having your Ph.D. is nothing to scoff at. And I have two.
Tired of quarantining, Raskolnikov becomes convinced that society must sacrifice the old for the greater good.
After completing any one of our adventures, your best self will be the one stuck inside with no one to talk to.