There are plenty of fish in the sea, but most need to be thrown back. You are strong and independent. and should never be forced to settle. Good isn’t good enough. Great is just ok.

What you’re really looking for, is the one.

The one who inspires you to be your best self. The one who makes you feel comfortable in your own skin. The one who can finally vanquish the Dark Lord and restore the kingdoms of man. Here are a few questions you can ask yourself to find out if he’s a keeper, or just some other fish.

Does he have a mentor?

A strong role model in a man’s life can really help him learn how to be responsible and how to listen. When starting your courtship with a prospective man, find out who their mentors are. Perhaps it’s a wizened old monk, a wizard who speaks mostly in riddles, or a rich reclusive uncle. All of these are huge green flags. A good rule of thumb is that if the mentor is over the age of sixty and spends most of their day wearing robes, then you are dealing with an absolute keeper.

A note of caution: some have asked me if a father can count as a mentor. The answer is yes, but only if they are dead, and their dying words were so impactful that repeat in your partner's mind whenever they are faced with a substantial decision.

If this is not the case and your man's father is still alive, then at some point the two will have to face off in single combat.

What’s his relationship with jewelry?

Jewelry being only for women is a thing of the past. More and more nowadays, men are wearing earrings, bracelets, and other accessories. Not only do these accessories prove that your man is fashion-forward, but there is also the possibility that your man is carrying some ancient artifact passed down for generations.

Is that really an earring your boy toy is wearing, or is it the final piece of the puzzle the Dark Lord needs to plunge the world into darkness, that he is solemnly protecting just as his ancestors did before him? Is that weirdo on the street wearing a pocket watch like he’s some sort of theater kid/newsie hybrid, or is he carrying a compass with the clues to finding Atlantis locked inside? Is that man in the grocery store married, or is he wearing that ring because, until he destroys the accursed thing, it is his responsibility, and he won’t damn the world by letting it slip out of his grasp?

You will likely never get a straight answer to any of these questions, for your own safety of course, but isn’t it the mystery that keeps a relationship exciting?

How reluctant is he to do things?

The last thing you want is a guy who is too eager. In fact, he shouldn’t be eager to do anything. A good green flag to look for is if he drones on, all the time, about wanting a normal life. Basically, you want a guy who would rather be a fry cook at a fast-food restaurant than a superhero. As a rule of thumb, only the exceptional want to be normal. It should be a hassle to get him to do anything. He can’t possibly be the guy you deserve if he is just going to give in to the very first call to adventure.

Does he have enemies?

It’s been said that the only people who don’t have enemies are the ones with no convictions. Men with real beliefs and passion will stand up for their principles and that’s bound to rustle some feathers. If a man has enemies, that’s how you know he has convictions and that he stands for something; both of which are non-negotiable in the perfect guy.

So, if having some enemies is good, having a ton must be even better. Do mysterious strangers grill you about his whereabouts? Every time you go out, are you running into angry goons? Is he being hunted, or even better, haunted? Most importantly, does he have a nemesis who will try to kidnap you to get to him

Sure, there are guys out there who will claim they will protect you, but the chosen one will need to because of all his enemies.

With these questions in mind, you should be set to judge whether or not you are with the right guy. You deserve a kind of love that is straight out of the storybooks.

If you do find the chosen one, be careful. Side effects of such relationships include: being killed off for character development, being the object of desire in a tense love triangle, and in one very rare case, finding out the chosen one is actually your long-lost sibling. Good luck.