You Need to Know about These Five Cognitive Biases (Sponsored by Bayer, the New Owner of Roundup)
At Bayer, we have a duty to pretend we have a duty to have a positive impact on the world.
Tag: Satire
“Jessie’s Girl” Made You a Guide on How to Find a Woman Like Her
You Remind Me of Jessie’s Girl! Please, Do Tell Me, Do You Have a Name? – While just a tad bit rude, this is also respectful enough to answer!
I Am the Reply All Button and God Am I Sexy
Yes!! Tell the whole department how unintuitive you find the system. Oh YES it’s been so hard for you to find your files since the software update.
Best Man Speech for the Worst Couple
Seeing you both now, I think we will sue. Sorry—I think we will. SUE, and Noah, you are clearly blessed.
Censorship Is Preventing Me from Publishing My Novel “Rat Sex in Outer Space”
Brave ideas drowned in a sea of silence. That’s a direct quote from "Rat Sex in Outer Space" and it applies here.
Self-Guided Meditation for You Lonely People This New Year
Take a moment to become aware of the sounds around you. Tune out your next-door neighbors who won’t stop having elaborate sex.
Our Company Is One Big Family, If Families Laid Off 30% of Their Family Members
It's truly killing me that our family's goals for next year don't seem to include your position and your services will no longer be needed here.
It’s an Honor to Be Your Band-Aid on This Momentous Vaccination Day!
I always dreamed of big things, like covering a knife cut on Mark Bittman’s finger, or a scrape on Usain Bolt’s leg, or being forgotten in Beyonce’s purse.
Drive-Into Experience: “12 Angry Men” Circa 1957
Starting to feel claustrophobic? Great! That’s precisely how you should feel as you fake deliberate the fate of a human being.
Whatever Happened to That Kid Who Jumped Over the Candlestick?
My parents whisked me into showbiz after the nursery rhyme was published. Birthday candles, campfires, firecrackers... I jumped over it all.
You Are Entirely to Blame
It is your blueberry Pop-Tarts that are killing the porpoises. Not your neighbor’s Pop-Tarts or that guy in Idaho’s Pop-Tarts.
My Life Recording the Beatles (Excerpt from Chapter 13: “Unfortunately the Tapes Are Destroyed”)
It had been about three weeks of increasingly nasty slip-ups but perhaps now the jig was finally up.