I’m Your College RA and Sacrificing Your Dormmates Is Fine as Long as I Don’t See It
I'm not gonna be a cop about booze or weed or the occasional mysterious disappearance of a fellow resident.
Comedy Writing
PEMDAS: The Remix
We’re excited to announce that, in producing the new PEMDAS, we’ve partnered with French tire proprietor and restaurant reviewer Michelin!
I’m the Pinch Pot You Made in Third Grade—Why Won’t Your Mother Let Me Die?
I looked around: Pristine bowls, with smooth edges, not a pinch in sight. My exterior sports at least seven visible fingerprints and a hole that slowly leaks.
Barbecue So Good You’ll Shit Your Pants in a Way That Gives You a Fetish?
No one leaves this barbecue place walking straight on account of the barbecue fucks so hard. Yeah, that's good.
I Am an Employee Helping You with Self-Checkout and Aren’t You Full of Yourself
Well, well, well, take a look at who has an unexpected item in their bagging area.
Hello? Should I Stop Buying Kale?
Are you… still buying kale? Please tell me I’m not the only one. Oh God, I have so much kale.
I Am the Reply All Button and God Am I Sexy
Yes!! Tell the whole department how unintuitive you find the system. Oh YES it’s been so hard for you to find your files since the software update.