Open Letters | Points in Case

Tag: Open Letters

What do you people want from me? To jump in my bald-eagle-shaped submarine and hand-deliver it to one of your warehouses?

Not to be a prude, but when you’re loud late at night it keeps me awake when I’m trying to sleep.

Cleveland is nothing if not unique. Have you ever BEEN to Cleveland’s own franchise, the Harry Buffalo Saloon?

I respect the State of California’s 100-yard rule, and I value precision, which is why I bought one hundred yardsticks at Home Depot.

Have you considered making me taller and more visually striking? Might be good for brand recognition.

While you were busy arguing about whether or not I’m still in style, did you ever stop to consider my feelings?

Crying Pods: 70% of employees also reported participating in, during this past year, a daily ritual of “crying my pretty little eyes out.”

Do you know how expensive microchips are? I didn’t become a billionaire by just going around giving away MICROCHIPS all the time!

And what about my heart, my battery? Fifteen years and still going strong. Always keeps its charge.

Just wanted to send a solid “wassup” to our 4,000 new members who joined during the pandemic. Our group is now 4,014 birders strong.

Here is my main concern: What if I wear something really ugly the day I die?

I’ve never needed the Pythagorean Theorem for any moment of my life. I’m a million times better off without you, just like I always thought.