Xarkax denied us our pre-scheduled lunch break, citing breaching the castle walls as the main priority. Just because we do not have the biological need to eat does not mean we do not appreciate an allotted time to socialize.
I'll be honest, I expected to hate you. I thought our relationship would be filled with searing pain, occasional blood, and lots of tears.
Lately you’ve become… extremely cluttered. And not in a quirky, millennial-bookstore way.
Many of you are more than friends, you’re also treasured shareholders of American Correctional Solutions, so I don’t need to tell you that ACS’s profits are through the roof.
We've got a group of diner patrons who respect military service and don't shy away from saying what's on their mind. Want to know what they think?
It is no secret that our relationship is entirely transactional, but still, our story was romantic. I convinced myself that this was love.
I’ve read that Forbes named your circle as one of America's best groups to befriend in 2024.
I’d like to say I understand your pain, but how could I? The only terror I’ve experienced is watching everyone I ever loved die.
The MacGruber Clan, Lords of the Valley of Non-Violence, have been acting suspiciously peaceful.
Now, I’m not bashing Chad. Chad’s fine. Chad does consistently adequate work, and he’s even finally learned what a pivot table is.
I know we only met in passing at Brianna’s Axe-Throwing Farewell Party, but I got SUCH a great vibe from you.
Surely this monstrosity holds some meaning that is beyond our minuscule Lego brains.