Visions I Had After Succumbing to the Madness That Befalls All Men Who Dare Drink the Milk of the Eldest Keebler Elf
If you are offered a chance to suckle at the teat of the eldest Keebler elf, I pray you heed my warning.
If you are offered a chance to suckle at the teat of the eldest Keebler elf, I pray you heed my warning.
Three tricycles, $170.00? What does a man need with three tricycles? I’ve never once seen him exercise!
We’ll start with an easy one here to get this going: A Three-Hour Corporate PowerPoint Presentation with Required Participation.
May 5 – Cinco de Mayo: IVs previously containing live-saving antivirals and convalescent plasmas will be replaced with frozen margaritas.
I didn’t have a chance to respond as that monster of a machine came back around, running over a cardboard standup of Neo from "The Matrix."
Now, I’ll admit. I knew the words that I was singing were not in fact “words.” They were more like syllables strung together.
Compared to 2020’s real-life plague, threat of fascist coup, and so on, your work has suffered from a lack of terrifying imagination.
December 12: Santa's naughty list of Democrat-controlled cities where the most egregious instances of police brutality take place (uh oh; it's long).
With so much laughter and Vicodin flooding the streets during the daylight hours, powerful dream beasts emerge to rule the night.
"The rooms were comfortable, the food was exquisite and my husband and I had a glorious time in the pool until they released those piranhas.”
Dining Room Swear Jar: $1 Dark Corner Of The Attic Swear Jar: $57 Home Office Swear Jar: $0
Instead of the usual ghouls chasing you through the hallways, this year's tour will offer you a respite from the ongoing horror show that is 2020.