I’m Your College RA and Sacrificing Your Dormmates Is Fine as Long as I Don’t See It
I'm not gonna be a cop about booze or weed or the occasional mysterious disappearance of a fellow resident.
Tag: College
Quiz: Who Said It? Kurt Cobain, Kurt Vonnegut, or Kurt, My Libertarian College Roommate
- “I feel stupid and contagious.” - "Masks are stupid it's not even that contagious."
College Packing List, Questionable Performance Art, and a 911 Call
Keith Jeep prepares his daughter for college, public performance art goes awry, and Jean Collins makes her most daring call yet.
List: Are You the Protagonist of a Borges Story or Just in a Room with Some Professors?
- An important work of literature is being discussed. You have not read it. - You are mostly silent.
First Post-Pandemic Faculty Meeting Bingo
- Anecdote about resilience of human spirit - Science faculty smug whenever vaccine is mentioned
“Of Course, It’s Gone Now…”: An Oral History of All the Places My Boomer Parents Have Ever Visited
Dad: The town’s richest family used to own that. Now, everyone goes to Wally-Mart... Me: You have like, 17 pants from Walmart.
A Tribute to Mr. Thompson: Teacher, Mentor, Possible Necromancer
It was never clear what subject he was supposed to be teaching, since on our schedules it was spelled in mysterious runes that burned your eyes.
Hi, I’m Reader #2, and I Wouldn’t Be Doing My Job If I Didn’t Tell You That Your Writing Is Garbage
Congrats on your new academic article, though I should really be congratulating myself because the version of your I wrote in my head is much better.
An Obituary for All the Fucks I Had to Give
All My Fucks graduated from Shame University in 1998 with high honors.
List: A Sweet Sixteen of Things More Likely to Happen to You Than Picking a Perfect March Madness Bracket
Your next tweet will go viral, attracting the attention of your biggest celebrity crush and leading to a passionate affair. (1 in 40.3 billion)
I Haven’t Left My Room Since March and Now the Demon Who Lives Under My Bed Has a UTI
With each passing day, her resolve grows weaker. She begins to wonder if the girl above will once again leave her in peace.
In Defense of Gap Years… Unless You Want to Hire Me
A gap year will help to make me the man I want to be. Unless you are planning to hire me, in which case: STOP READING. GIVE ME THE JOB.