A Letter to Management Written by Your Disgruntled Dog
This new hire, a human-in-training or “cute smushy baby," has been rude, selfish, and has made zero meaningful contributions to the company.
Tag: Babies
Birth Control Brand or White Celebrity Baby Name?
Lyra? Aranelle? Zuma? Kyleena? Gio?
I’m the Screaming Baby on an Airplane—It’s a Tough Crowd Here
What’s the deal with rattles nowadays? Seems to me like a poor excuse for jangly keys! Oh, wait– can someone bring me a bottle?
Your Newborn Infant and Other Props That Will Take Your Thirst Traps to the Next Level
Your Four Grocery Bags So You Don't Have to Make Two Trips: These are overstuffed, precariously placed, and definitely digging into your shoulders.
The Decline in U.S. Birth Rate Isn’t Due to the Pandemic, It’s Due to Spider Plants
The lack of children being born is not due to Millennials having less sex, but rather the funky little houseplants known as spider plants.
A Toddler’s Guide to Chess
The queen travels around the board very fast, knocking over the other pieces, sometimes singing "Let It Go" from Disney’s Frozen.
5 Baby Registry Must-Haves in Today’s Climate Crisis
Baby wearing is very in right now. You can do the dishes, vacuum, or paddle a lifeboat out of your flooded neighborhood.
Is It a Baby, a Small Dog, or Something Else Entirely in That Stroller/Reversible Bassinet/All-In-One Travel System?
While doing a forward bend in the local park, you smell… A) Doggy breath B) Baby poop C) Your name being added to a new Slack channel
What to Do if Your Mother Keeps Hinting that You, The One True Begotten Son of God, Should Really Give Her Grandkids Already
Every Chanukah for the past seven years she kept telling you she doesn't want you to buy her anything, with “BUY” and “THING” in air quotes.
The Comments Section of a Wholesome Video of a Puppy and a Baby
“Do we even know if the parents adopted this puppy? What if they stole it? Is this baby even theirs? You can’t believe everything you read online!!”
15 Printed Onesies Worn by Babies Who Will Eventually Struggle to Move Up Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs
25% Mommy, 25% Daddy, 25% Mommy’s Yoga Coach, 15% Daddy’s Secretary, 5% Tinder Guy Who Was Into Daddy and Daddy’s Secretary, 5% Lube, 100% PERFECT ME!
Simple Lines to Drop for Getting Out of Babysitting Your Friends’ New Baby
Have you seen that Dateline episode about the swimming babies? / Anyone can breastfeed, right? / He'll fit right in my backpack!