I Am the Beaten Path, and I Resent That You’re So Hell Bent on Getting Off Me
Getting walked all over is one thing. But being abandoned is what hurts me most of all.
Miriam Jayaratna is a clinical psychologist and comedy writer based in NYC. Her other writing can be found on Slackjaw, Little Old Lady Comedy, Greener Pastures, and various psychology journals. She writes comedy because Freud said humor is the best coping mechanism, after you've blown through all your cocaine.
Getting walked all over is one thing. But being abandoned is what hurts me most of all.
Your own teeth, pulsed a few times in the Cuisinart. / Tiny blue gravel from the fish tank you haven’t cleaned out since your guppy, Lucy, died.
Carrie’s new side hustle is: A) Monetizing her signature monologues with a TED Talk! B) Renting out rooms in her apartment on Airbnb.
Subscription to the Nonrefundable Security Deposit Wine of the Month Club – Let them drown their sorrows with Funk Band Bordeaux or Bouquet of Rosé.
World War I (1914-1918) – Bosnian-Herzegovian couple Davud and Emina give their guests blue toy guns to fire into the streets of Sarajevo.
What does your child do for fun? A) Mescaline. B) Sits quietly while parents read NYT Cooking section. C) Derives enjoyment from pleasing others.