Animals | Page 18 | Points in Case

Tag: Animals

I have to be me. I’m not going to stop eating the heads off of my mates after sex just because “the patriarchy frowns on it, Allie,”

Listen to the language, Jeff. “Designated area,” ”gentle correction.” Is this our backyard or is this Auschwitz?

Although, speaking of our actual bodies, you should absolutely look a gift horse in the mouth. You can tell a horse's age by looking at its teeth.

It rains all the time and sometimes floods, but it’s never awful, so it wouldn’t surprise me if our Heavenly Father said this purely to make a fuss.

A lot of people will call into question whether or not attacking robots in a theme restaurant can be considered a sport.

My patients are my best friends. Where would I be if they hadn't let me crash on their couches after the mob found out I'm sleeping at my office?

Citrus: Blood Orange: An orange (Liam Neeson) will team up with soil (Leonardo DiCaprio) to unravel why other oranges in the grove are exploding.

One time I was forced to watch my snail body get boiled, made into a ceviche soup, and served to a family of blondes on their backyard tennis court.

Maybe I’ll save a kid from drowning by jumping from a bridge. A local hero, on the news...wait, no one under 70 watches the news: trend on Twitter.

Thinking he'd overtaken the tortoise in the race, the hare took a nap under a tree. He was right to sleep, given his Adidas UltraBoost running shoes.

Featuring almost as much nudity and survival-based killings as the smash-hit HBO series, this is sure to be the can't-miss reality show of the year.

Michael and LeBron do not like mountain climbing. They’re just not any good at it. Conversely, Baby Goat can scale a mountain like nothing.