The Nerdiest Way to Get Drunk
I didn't want just ANY kind of deliriously drunk, I wanted to get Video Game Deliriously Drunk. Here are my personal experiences with nine gamer cocktails.
Tag: Alcohol
Highly Unconventional Super Bowl XLVII Drinking Game
What you need: one drink per person, one hurricane cocktail for every table, and residual enthusiasm from when you initially learned Tom Brady wasn't in the Super Bowl.
10 Reasons to Quit Drinking
Things to look forward to after you stop drinking: eating crazy meals without vomiting, filming neighborhood pornography, and immunity to previously insulting comments.
The Complete Lunatic’s Guide to Cheap and Illegal Alcohol
It has been brought to my attention that sometimes people get sober. Mostly because they don't have enough money or brain cells left to take drinking to the next level.
My First Day at Alcoholics Anonymous
For most people, Alcoholics Anonymous might be a second chance, a new lease on life. For me, it was a place for people to make fun of my most vulnerable physical attributes.
How to Get Properly Drunk for Your Next Big Party
Drinking isn't a one-size-fits-all activity, so how exactly are you gonna get drunk for your next party, office function, or family gathering? Here are 11 recipes for your next event.
My First Time Buying Alcohol for High Schoolers
I bought liquor for two high school guys at a concert the other day, my first experience giving back to the underage alcoholic community I was once a member of.
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Drinking
Pro tips for becoming a better binge drinker, disregarding the advice of others, and mastering the art of elevating your blood alcohol content. You're on your way to getting super drunk again!
Bouncer Wisdom: Bulletproof Juice
How do bouncers deal? Well, besides being pompous pricks? The answer lies in a magical nectar: Bulletproof Juice.
A Misfit Looks at Thirty
So here it is, the big one. The thirtieth birthday. Tomorrow I become socially, culturally and sexually irrelevant.
Behind Bars that Don’t Serve Beer
<p>Like many of America's most profitable industries, prison has gotten a lot less fun over the years. Despite what the movies may tell you, there is no smoking in prison. A lot of criminals I know try to avoid jail because of that fact alone. Three years away from the wife and kids? Excellent. No Marlboros? Fuck that. </p>
Famous Moments in Alcohol: Awesomely Alcoholic Americans
Mankind's history is littered with moments when booze reigned supreme. America's high points include General Grant's whiskey habits, Paul Revere's loud drunken warnings, and the early recruitment of U.S. Marines.