Escape Room Mission Report for Susan’s 16th Birthday Party
When Lisa got bored and snuck a peek at the cobwebs, Julie told everyone about Lisa’s crush on your dandruffy history teacher.
Tag: Friends
Can I Help the Next Person in Line at the Department of Breakups?
We ask that you fill out all forms in pencil for this very reason; your forms are illegible because the ink has run everywhere due to your tears.
Other Things Elizabeth Warren Has a Plan For
Paying for that improv class. Paying for single-payer healthcare. Getting back together with Jeff. Convincing Jeff to come to your improv show.
It’s My Birthday Year!
QUARTER-BIRTHDAY: We'll kick things off with a low-key brunch nine months in advance of my birthday.
An Apology for Not Drinking at the Party Last Night
Waking up this morning without a hangover was a total bummer, and I fully regret making a conscious decision to do so.
Stages of Grief That You, A Prospective Homeowner, Will Have to Process Before Accepting Your Fate and Becoming a Mole Person
Obsession: Refresh Zillow every three minutes. Ignore texts from your friends. Optimize your meals by blending your food & sipping it from a thermos.
How to Absolutely and Utterly Bomb at an Open Mic
If you hear a man joke, “I’m a real feminist because I would never tell a woman to smile; I yell at them to frown,” then you’ve found the right crowd.
Interactions Adam Levine Has With People Who Aren’t the Country Judge from “The Voice”
Eating brie, Adam, his wife, friends close and warm—it’s couples night. "No I won’t take my shirt off right here! No!" Adam takes his shirt off.
Five Binge-Worthy Shows That Will Help You Forget You are Wasting Your Summer
"Stranger Things": This coming of age sci-fi romp will take you back to a time when you could actually enjoy summer.
Area 51 Raid Packing Essentials
A stolen bomb squad dog to sniff out the aliens. (They probably smell kind of like TNT.) Your grandmama Ellis’ necklace, so you can be buried with it.
A Year of No
A friend finds an aggressive dog hiding under a car. She asks if we will take him in temporarily. I know I need to swallow my fear, so I say yes.
Dear Valued Offspring, Before You Leave for College, Please Take a Moment to Fill Out This Customer Satisfaction Survey About Your Upbringing
How would you rate the attitude of our management team? Overall did they seem motivated and alert?