Philisophical Question

Do you think God ever gets drunk? When he does, is that when hurricanes, car accidents, and other tragedies happen?

God must be an alcoholic.

Bad Anti-War Slogan

Drop Babies Not Bombs

New Pornography Title Ideas

The British Are Coming
Who Would You Do For a Klondike Bar?

Bad Logic

When I was in middle-school and going through my skateboarding phase, whenever we got yelled at for skating somewhere, we would say “well there's no sign saying we can't.” This doesn't really hold up to logic, since with this same argument you could smoke weed in church since there's no “No Smoking Weed” sign there; or whatever your fantasy crime is.

Cereal Killing

Do you think some serial killers eventually become so productive and prolific that their diet consists entirely of human parts and nothing else? It would be great not to have to shop for groceries. Plus, nothing beats the taste of a human pinky toe with some ranch sauce.

More Philosophies

Are there homeless people in Heaven? If so, do they ask everyone for change?

Why aren't there getaway cars for crimes like rape?

My money really is hard-earned since I don't have a job.

Don't Buy Lawyers From The Dollar Store

“Your Honor, the only thing my client is guilty of is maybe being a bit too manslaughtery.”

Porno or Church Homily/Sermon?

God Touches Us All
The Body of Christ
Is Jesus In You?
On Your Knees
Jesus Is Coming
Give Yourself To Jesus
What Will You Do For Jesus?
Jesus Was Hung (On The Cross)
Is Jesus Inside You?

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