I bet Picasso's friends didn't get mad at him when he drew dicks on their face when they passed out early at parties.
How come you never see really extreme public displays of affection? Like anal sex in the park? Or a gangbang in a third-grade classroom?
I wonder if the Church Channel had problems coming up with material during the Writer's Strike…
If you ever get depressed because you're not making it as a musician/actor/writer/whatever, just think – no one became successful/rich/famous right away. Einstein used to go around repeating “e equals mc squared” but nobody would listen to him.
If you fail Sunday school, do you go to Hell?
I want to go in a movie theater and keep whispering “Fire!” over and over, getting increasingly louder until someone hears me. Then I'll stop abruptly, look around nervously, and continue watching the movie quietly.
I think instead of remaking classic movies and television shows, ruining the original, they should remake recent movies and just say “we screwed up.” Instead of making 3 Fast 3 Furious or some new movie, let's remake Drillbit Taylor. Owen Wilson can play himself, and this time don't fuck it up.
What flavor of Kool-Aid do you think is most popular with cults?
If I ever babysit any young children, I'm going to do all I can to be their temporary parent for the night. If that means giving them the sex talk, then so be it.
I wonder if any pornographic films have like a deep underlying meaning to them. Is the newest Bang Bus video a metaphor for early 1920's Communist Russia? Is 2 Girls 1 Cup a Vonnegut-esque skewering of American society today?
Here's my To-Do list:
