Dear Roxy,
For the love of God woman, you are not a nun so stop acting like it! Jesus Christ, every time I want to hit something, you have to go use actual logic and emotions and other un-feminist bullshit. Just go after it already! I really don’t care about your insecurities anymore than I care about your damn mind. I don’t care what you do as long as you’re not doing it yourself. Could you please just release all the pent up sexual frustration I’ve been saving? Golly, you’d think someone would have met your silly standards since we’ve moved. Did you really think that you could get some without being just teensy bit less subtle? Grow some ovaries and hit on someone already.
Sincerely,
Your Libido
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Dear Libido,
Shut. Up.
Please fuck off,
Roxy
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Dear Roxy,
You have got to be the worst bi-woman in the existence of all that is perverted and good. If you honestly cannot keep a man interested, you suck (in a completely unsatisfactory way) far worse than anything I can imagine. I pray you find someone who brings out the animalistic nature you so desperately try to dismiss from thought. I hope you turn into a nymphomaniac who gets hospitalized for exhaustion. I hope you’re happy with yourself, you evil little bitch. You ruin everything.
Love to, but you won’t let me,
Your Libido
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Dear Libido,
What do you suggest I do? Start walking around town naked? What about changing my profile picture to one of me in my pretty little underwear? Oh I know, I’ll just pick someone out of the crowd and lead them to my room because there’s no way they could possibly be a rapist. I’ll just practice the art of seduction on every Tom, Dick, and Jane that crosses my path. Let’s not forget making out with strange old men and drunken young women.
Because that would totally make me happy,
Roxy
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Dear Roxy,
I hate you.
And that really does make me happy,
Your Libido
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Dear Libido,
I love you because Jesus is making me.
Sincerely,
Roxy
Labels: inner conflicts, Lidido takes the stage, unreasonable hatred