The Golden Rules of IM, Part II

nice stuff, really nice stuff

You seem like a very troubled person...so what if you got touchd by the priest when you were a little boy, get over it. There is no need to spread your incoherant thought's on people who don't give two shit's as to someones complaints. If you have so many problems with AIM there is one quick solution to fix them...DONT USE AIM!!!

Hahaha. I loved it! Even tho I do half of the things u bitch about. I still found it funny. Good work!

My favorits are IV and X... they pretain to my bud who has a stalker and messeges him every frigin time with out fail... He doenst want to be mean but she is a fat ugly bitch... i wish everyone could see this site... its like you say what everone thinks, thx sir

Haha, I know right, this stuff is so true. All that shit drives me crazy. Good job.

penis

its supposed to be XX not XXX, jerk

fucking idiot PIERCE, XXX IS 30

you're even dumber for pointing out something thats actually not a mistake

Who the fuck cares what you think, you are just one pos on this planet out of 7 billion! Ever hear of freedom of speech fucker? (Here is another example it) I respect your use of it, but don’t go telling everyone to follow your fucked up rules! Don’t tell people what to do you will make more enemies this way than any other way. This is one bad thing about the Internet it has given brain dead people (YOU) the ability to convince people too dumb to understand what intelligence (everyone who posted above), what they need to do. Who the hell cares what you think? Mass conformity is the root of all evil, and those who promote it don’t deserve the privilege of life. Individuality must survive. Let me guess, you had no friends when growing up, and every one blocked you on aim. And now you get turned on by telling people what to do, you lead a sad life. Those who denounce freedom of expression should be in Guantanamo.

HAHA you are an interesting mother fucker

Dude seriously, I have no idea what the hell some peoples problems are. You try and show humor to the masses and thats what u get for it, someone named Ben Dover saying penis... Society as a whole has hit a new low point. Funny site tho. Good job.

seems to me u got a fucking stick shoved up ur ass.
get a life

Are these people serious? They can't take a friggin joke. Jesus Christ, people need to loosen up. Anyway, that was funny man, good job

FUNNY SHIT

Wow...some people need to chill...It is really not that serious. Anyways, nice addendum here. Oh, and XVIII and XIX need to be XXVIII and XXIX. That is all.

Hey dr.quinn, your an idiot. The guy was trying to give everyone a laugh about stupid things that people do on AIM so stop your incessant bitching and go fuck a goat.
P.S- saying 'Mass Conformity' doesnt make you smart, tool. Now go die.

nooo www.tubgirl.com is shut down! now where will i get my daily source of people shitting all over themselves?

THATS FUNNI AND SOME OF UR VIEWS R FUCKED UP BUT ITS UR VIEWS AND N E WAY DR. QUINN UMMMM ITS PPL LIKE U WHO GET PPL KILLED YA UMMMM JUST STOP WITH UR COMENTS THAY ARNT INTRESTIN YA SO NICE JOB...MAN

haha... that was great... i can relate to so many of the points you made.

Hey this site is fucking hilarious and if you want you can tell the bastards that bitch about this site that CrazyRob03 is you name and ill KILL THEM for you

EWWWWWWWW!!!!!! That tubgirl things sooooo grosss, c'mone now. Oh your article ish funny. But that is disgusting.

Honestly, whoever put the time into typing a ridiculously bad paragraph about this embodies all that is wrong with this world.

Wow, Dr. Quinn and all of you who can't take a joke, get that stick out of your ass. Seriously. I thought it was hilarious, because I can't stand it when people on AIM do those things!!! Nice job!

just because you have no friends dosent mean we dont and sometimes ppl like to rite like tis. will you get a life. the fact that you took the time to write this piece of fucking shit just goes to prove that your really boreing and you probably suck other men

welp...thank god someone still wants to use their brain. bravo for the nice insight. we all understand what you are saying...even those who made negative comments. they are probably just tired. ps...emily dickinson knew what was up.

Ben A. and Dr. Quinn... Shut the fuck up. nobody cares about what you think either... stop trying to ruin the funny stuff online... anyway these rules are amazing (though i do a lot of the shit anyway) some of it also annoys me as well... keep on writin good stuff

Everything so so true. I would like to see another golden rule though. I think that "hey" should be taken away as a greeting. its just an extra step. so i always start with "whats up" but people will respond with "hey." but i asked what they were doing and "hey" does not tell me what they are doing. it only forces me to ask again whats up, in a different form like "whats goin on." those people make me so angry

www.tubgirl.com
^^that is soooooo! hott r u kidding?

good shit

That's so great, and everyone does it but it's all so annoying in it's own little quirky ways, some people just don't have a sense of humor and take it all as actual complaints, they are just too immature to realize that it's dark comedy at it's finest.

Anything in life can be torn apart and made humorous, making fun of AIM certainly isn't one of the worst things ever used in dark comedy, it's not rape, no people's feelings are involved, unless people decide to take it personally, and no one like that will survive in the real world as an adult if they can't take stuff like this with a grain of salt.

I personally found it hilarious, and I love the cynicality and the consistency of the humor throughout the different rules that everyone does but knows what you mean at the same time.

Good work bro, I'd really love to see more.

Dr Quinn, bend over and suck my balls you fuckin queer.

(Kickass shit. Good job.)

Mann i do like alot of these on accident! Will definitely stop now!

please, just do me. like tubgirl is doing her own shit.

Really funny stuff. Good job I enjoyed it.

Wow, you seem so bitter about everything. Just chill. You must have no sex life.... I feel bad for you, stop being so uptight about everything, just let it go, it dosen't matter what the other person's font/background color is. It's not a big deal! And your comments #26-30 are just desprite things you thought of to fill the page... they're not even funny anymore. First 10 were okay, loosen up man.

You should add the "1 minute before 1pm" rule, which means that no one may IM you at the asscrack of dawn (asscrack of dawn=before 1pm) at the same moment when you sign on. You need to get yourself oriented with the brightness of the computer screen, etc before someone starts yakking your ear off (Jamie)!!!!

hilarious article, although the last 10 weren't as funny...

im scarred for life (www.tubgirl.com)

i hate when people say sup? the answers gunna 95% of the time be n/m or nuttin really you? if ur online ur not doing anything.

that was terrible. i wish that you assholes would stop trying to be like seanbaby.

This whole comments list makes me sad.

i would love to see that gay porn feature. not that i want to see gay porn, but that i... well shit.

yeah at first it was funny... but as i read on i realized whoever writes that much crap about something so stupid and meaningless must have way too much time on their hands. go do something with your life dude.

whoever wrote this GET A FUKING LIFE!!!

I thought it was absolutely hilarious as well... My personal favorite was the 10 minute "BRB" window! I bitch at my own friends when they are gone for more than 10 minutes... and if they were gone for less than that, I just bitch that driving to West Virginia is just as bad... Excellent job and hopefully you'll come up with some more! Keep em comin!

Great article. Everything is very true, I see it every day on IM. He tells it.

If you think tubgirl is gross, then go to

http://www.stilemedia.com/

Dr. Quinn I applaud your efforts, However, I must say you are a complete dumbass and obviously jealous. The fact that you take the time to write such long paragraphs of hate maybe shows that you are the one with no life. This man is just sharing his opinions with the rest of the world Dr. Quinn, can you not see that? No one said you had to agree with it. You are also a hypocrite for saying that you support individuality, because if everyone hated this article like you then would that too not be mass conformity? You instead made a complete fool of yourself infront of the World Wide Web..Damn man I thought you knew.

you need to add another thing to your list of aim rules. no annoying ass inside jokes. they're annoying.

YOU'RE LEAVING WITHOUT DAVID!!!" thank god mica is so observant
*sarah "NEGATORY!!!"...john "NO! CONFIRMATIVE!"
*sarah- YOU TRIED TO SHAVE?
me- no, i DID shave!
* our tour director "besides, they're with their father!"
*He's a virgin killer, out to take advantage of me!

that's a person i know's actual profile, how annoying is that crap.

the names on the post below were changed to protect the innocent

Im glad you enjoy having sex with your hand.

personally..i think this article is hilarious..i admit i do some of these things, but for you people who need to fucking kill yourself and do more than 3 of these, stop complaining on this comments page..its not this guys fault youre a total fag and no one likes you...he was just spreading the truth. WORD BROTHER!

how about we learn to type words out? nothing annoys me more than when people go " kk buhbye lylas" "hey , wuts ^? r u goin 2 b ready 4 skool on mon.?" that crap is so annoying. schools make us learn to type for a reason. dont use all that crap
okay im done
nice website
i love it
especially how it makes the fags out there want to kill themselves because they realize that their life sucks and they should not be fags

okay. all you fags who are posting negative crap about this need to get your heads out of your ass. if you think this page is remotely retarded, then why are you reading the whole god damn thing and posting a multi paragraph essay on the comments page? go find something better to do.. like get your head out of your ass. PEACE

love the website.. very true about it all, include more

I haven't laughed like that in a while, thank you so much!

Wow, that was awesome. I admit to some of that stuff, but I found it funny nonetheless.

Oh, and Dr. Quinn and the other haters...

I hate you. You suck. Die. ^^

i agree with catch.....dr quinn and other retards like him say u have no life??? at least u did done something productive. all they can do is read an article they don't even like then spend the rest of their day complaining about it. wtf? if u don't like it, then don't fuckin read it!
i love ur site! the first ten were especially awesome. keep it up!

wow. that was good. real good. add more.

Please add more!!!

this stuff is great....i loved it and this you're awesome....i see like all of this stuff everyday while im on AIM
i dont understand these idiots who need to come in here and write "penis" or try to correct you with the xxx thing...this idiot was prolly thinkin about pron...fuckin lowlives prolly serf the web to do this stuff....

dr quinn...ur gay and im gonna fuck u up...yo props on all the funny stuff man

part one was hilarious.

no offense, but this one wasn't.

haha that made my night. you should add "people who type in really big font and say a lot of stuff" because then you're IM box is MILES long because genius number one can't read their own damn font without it being size 99,999. i'm not bitter with the people who stalk me online 0:)
But keep up the amusement. It's hilarious

At first, i was like the others and took this way too seriously, now i agree w/it. It is freakin' hilarious. Some people take this stuff like it is an art. Thanks for the reality check! Something to add, like mentioned before...random inside jokes in the profile!!

Half of those I have already lived by without reading this,nor have i done like any of them, the other half im making it my goal to make sure others know and stop doing the gay ass shit that they always do....smiley's, saying brb for a week at a time, and then the worst is easily..lol, omg, and various abreviations which have plagued our society and ruined everyone's learning ability.

Never thought we had to live by other people's belief on some chatting program. IM is for our personal use and not for rules to be written about unless you, yourself are obsessed with it. Funny statements overall, but all opinions, considering it has "My" and "I" used repetitively indicating that it's all about your personal experience. Have a good one and humor brainless net surfers if you still have the interest.

Yet, funny.

OMG this is the funniest shit ever. it's all true and i know that i do it all the time, and that i'd addicted to aim. i cant believe that someone actually came up with this, but i'm sending it to everyone cause it's out of control funny!

I just took the time to read this all, and i think taht everyone who got to my comment at the very top, starting at the bottom, has no life(including me). I will summerize the posts below so u dont ahve to read alot of nonsense. A dude named Dr. Quinn bashed the writer of the article, then people took sides and it was a bloody mess, pple yelling, writing long paragraphs, the point is, yea the article was funny, but yea the author of ti does seem to sort of have a stick up his ass. we all must remember...no matter how much we type...it does not matter.

hmm yea like the last person.. i have to agree...but also to that person who was going on and on about how we shouldnt follow someone elses rules....cant you kind of tell that its a joke...or is all humor just plain lost on you?

Yo, Quinn, freedom of speech means he has the ability to say what he thinks. See, it works both ways. He can write these articles, while you can bitch in long, stupid paragraphs about them. Now EVERYBODY'S happy!

To the author: Nice job dude. I was laughing my ass off the entire time. Buttfuk27...I gotta remember that. :P

~OFX

HAHHAAHA. i loved this.
i actually laughed out loud at a lot of the things i read.
and fuck what people say, this is hilarious, and good entertainment when youre utterly bored, and your little brother is watching thomas the tank engine, while your mother is reading on the big purple couch.
i absolutely loved it.
and i agreed with a lot of the stuff, actually.
haha. wow. okay, im done thanks.

yea Part I was freaking hilarious
Part II was a disappointment

wow this was like hilarious even though i am guilty of most of them.

although half that stuff is me, thats some good shit

You are the man.......

haha.. ok.. this is honest to god the greatest thing ive ever seen!!!!

Yeah, I imagine he has heard of it, Dr. Quinn, but apparently you have not--at least in it's proper context. "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or ABRIDGING THE FREEDOM OF SPEECH..." That's a good chunk of the First Amendment to that little thing called the US Constitution. I doubt they still teach that in school these days since you appear to be such a little shit-head. Let me break it down for you--is Justin Rebello "Congress" as defined by the US Constitution? Negative. Therefore, you cannot use the "freedom of speech" tagline that is quite often abused by little liberal shit-heads (NOTE: "real" liberals=good--even though I am a Conservative, I believe it is good to have another side of the coin, so to speak) Also, your reasoning is non sequitor (I know you cannot wrap your little brain around it, but that is a "common usage" Latin phrase meaning "it does not follow") since you blast him for telling others to curtail certain forms of expression when you advise him to do the same thing. Following your implicit reasoning that we are all equal (again, not true... "Anyone who uses the line '[All] men are created equal' is trying to sell you something," and it is usually bull shit) what right would you have to tell Mr. Rebello that he should not post a castigation of IM mannerisms if he has, according to you, no right to tell others to curtail their behavior?

Also, perhaps Mr. Rebello does not care how many enemies he makes? That sentence sounds like something your "mommy" told you. Go tell your "mommy" that you hate her and that she is your enemy--after all, she's always told you what do, right? And once again, you are making enemies too--aren't you telling him not to tell people what to do? Isn't that telling him what to do? How are you placing yourself above everyone else in that manner? Where is your exemption from your own rules? You are such a moron because you do not even seem to see the stupidity behind your own statements--in fact, you probably think that you are being smart which falls into the category of "pathetic."

Yeah, I guess you are right. Mass conformity is evil. I mean, how dare people even make a decent attempt at proper grammar usage. And manners? Those are just what upper class people use to impress one another--not for good, common, earthy people like yourself. And what of laws? No, I suppose little trailer trash moles like yourself (or sub-urbanite pieces of shit--same thing in my reasoning) view your own little piece of the world that you will be paying for the next forty years and will re-finance twice because you need to "cash out your equity" because you cannot live within your means is sacrosant and inviolate to outside authorities. If you ask me, more people need to conform! Why? Because "going your own way" is only for those who have the requisite intelligence to do so--and not for

Eek! It cut some of my best parts off--oh well, I have already wasted too much time here.

SDC

I would just like to say that I have no penis. Yes I am Dr Quinn.

That was good stuff..... people seriously need to loosen up. If you don't like it then don't read it!

I just omitted studying for a research paper to read part 2. Time well spent... i'm going to write about this constitution instead of the piece of shit one that i was supposed to analize,,, emphasis on ANAL.

hey this stuff is hilirous and honestly put

<b></b> Hey Man that rocked! i mean yeahh i do about half that stuff but i still agree w/ u all the way !

that was some funny ass shit...and whoever didnt like it obviously has half a brain...i just sent it to lots of people and they all liked it

<b></b> :) I <i>loved</i> it!!

man, you are one smarty ass, all that stuff is so so true, well i glad im not addicted to aim

Oh mayn that was great! That was like the official AIM Constitution! Great, great stuff mayn! This is going in my profile...

LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL OMG I LUV MY HORSE , LIKE WHO ARE YOU HTEHEEHE OMGG "LIKE OMG"-me

all that is absolutley true. Dr.quinn FUCK YOU OK!!! NOONE GIVES A FLYING FUCK WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY ABOUT THE INTERNET AND PEOPLE USING IT!!AND YOU POSTED ABOVE IF I MIGHT ADD...DUMBASS!!! i am calm now...and agree with lurrrrrrian. h4x0rz is really gettin' on my nerves like when im playing an online rpg. LVL MEH PLZZZZ!!!!actually type PLEASE you idiots...oh hell ill probabley make my own guide about that on the site i praise.www.conqueronline.com! sorry if i advertised :(.

That was <b>awesome</b>. I agreed with everything in that article. Put something about the little customized alerts. like the short bits of a gay ass songs. Those piss me off beyond belief. If i have to hear "SINCE YOUVE BEEN GONE!" everytime someone signs on and signs off im going to toss my computer out the window. Once again everything was great and now i actually try to abide by your awesome rules.

I LOVED IT! it was so funny, but it was true. rock on