College Quotes
Doug: Fuck off you son of a whore!
Nate: Your momma!
Doug: YOUR momma!
Nick: I feel it fair to ask, if you guys are brothers, do the "Your momma" insults still count?
-On relative intelligence
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About Court Sullivan
Hometown
Huntsville, AL
School
Emory University
At a Glance
I am easily excited by spontaneous things, amusing people, random moments, minor observations, and alcohol. I like to travel, write comedy, buy electronics, and explore/abuse the internet.
Recent Comments
Cooking Salmon in Your Dishwasher
...And Other CRAZY RECIPE IDEARS!I bought some salmon the other day and went online to find some recipes on how to cook it. I wasn't looking for anything too fancy or complicated. Then I came to this recipe:
Cooking Salmon in a Dishwasher
Needs:
salmon fillets
aluminum foil
a lemon
a few butter pats
electric dishwasher
Place the fish on two large sheets of aluminum foil. Squeeze on some lemon juice and place the pats of butter on the salmon fillets. Seal the fillets well in the foil, and place the foil packet in the top wire basket of your electric dishwasher. DO NOT ADD SOAP OR DETERGENT. Close the dishwasher door, set the dishwasher on the hottest wash cycle, complete with drying cycle, and let it run through a full cycle. When the cycle is complete the fish will be cooked just right.
HMMM... something sounds FISHY....
Upon further investigation, however, it turns out this is a legit way to cook salmon! Which caused me to rethink everything I know about cooking.
So, in the spirit of things, here are some new culinary techniques I think someone should look into (maybe a chef?):
-Deep frying chicken over a greased, 100 watt light bulb
-Mixing drinks on a subwoofer during Prodigy's "Firestarter"
-Rubbing a genie into a bottle of dry wine (so as not to saturate the genie)
-Boiling peanuts in a flask
-Tossing salad in the dryer with ranch dryer sheets
-Putting a TV dinner in the microwave, then baking the microwave in the oven
-Eating every appliance but the kitchen sink
-Liquifying New York Strip steak in the blender for a pre-workout protein shake
-Knocking out the water in all your fruits using the George Foreman Grill
In related news, I've thrown out my toilet and will now be taking craps on my TV.
Anyone else have some ideas for alternative cooking methods? Leave them in the comments!
9 Comments
You're not funny.
My favorite part of the recipe is DO NOT ADD SOAP OR DETERGENT, I think that says a lot.
A lot of what, I cannot say.
And don't listen to the poster above. You are very funny.
But looks aren't everything.
My bodybuilder cousin actually does liquefy steak and chicken in a blender for breakfast...he calls them his "sweet meat shakes."
ramen noodles cooked using a coffee maker.
DeGraaf...YOU are funny. Court...not so funny...
The recipe was amusing...but his recipes weren't. Because, well...Court, you just aren't that funny when you try so hard to be so.
Maybe Nate should get a raise to "paid"...and Court should take classes...
i thought it was very amusing. you should post more often.
anyone else getting the impression that this anonymous asshole is some twat with multiple personalities?
Hey Tyler...I don't make fun of your impotence...so you don't make fun of my schizophrenia...k?
it is not seasoned very well...but not terrible either...
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