Women | Page 9 | Points in Case

Tag: Women

Know which spell you’re going to cast on the deli counter guy before you get to the front of the line. It’s unreal that some of you still do this.

You head straight to your corner, even though reserving spots isn't allowed, we all know it’s yours since you’re a woman of habit. And we fear you.

Your most memorable characteristics of me were “those eyes” and “that body.” Newsflash, Rick: most women on this planet have eyes and a body.

I want to do well, but every time I sit down to work, Steve makes me go on the internet and google “soccer stats” and “boobs” until the day is done.

Princesses are always getting smooched and we can get kisses, too! And hey, if we're going through a dry spell, a frog's not the worst option.

The producers were convinced that my boyfriend Todd was the actual killer. Have you seen Todd? My little baby cousin is stronger than him.

Negative and disgusting things you should save until at least the second date, if you're lucky enough to get that far.

Some of you have commented on social media asking, “Why are you an angry lesbian who’s trying to take a nice man’s place at the Congress? Also, fat.”

Frankly With Al Franken: Al Franken in a room, speaking frankly about political news. We know we shouldn’t want this to exist, but we quietly do.

The coven of womanhood is strict. I’ve given out more hugs to passersby than I ever wanted. I also have a ton of blood floating types in my body.

Ladies never worried about tripping over a factory-sized ass of ruffles, because they were sure to be carried by men dying to spend time with them.

“My moon is in Sagittarius, so I shut down emotionally to cope with stress! I told you that on Christmas after I punched that mall Santa!”