The New Adopt-a-Writer Program
Frederik (42, Breed: Poet (Non-Rhyming)) Frederik thinks he’s better than all the other writers at the shelter.
Tag: Twitter
Ten Classic Books Everyone Should Pretend to Read
Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare: The classic love story. It’s a famous… I want to say play? I’ve only seen the movie with Leonardo DiCaprio.
I, Space Godzilla, Am The Masked Singer
Some of my fans may have guessed who I was when I sang “Roar” by Katy Perry. No matter how much I practiced, I couldn’t hold in my signature screech.
Where the Hell are All the Snowmen?
Every snowstorm, I was out in my front yard. That is your duty as a child in America. These snowflakes need to buck up and make a fucking snowman.
Things @fuckjerry Stole From Me
@fuckjerry even went back to my high school, played "Riff" in "West Side Story," and used all my ad libs just to twist the knife.
How to Imagine Yourself Running (and Writing) in a Foreign Country
Step 21: Start by googling quotes about running, a weird number of which are from the Japanese novelist Haruki Murakami.
Sincere 404 Page Not Found Errors
Domino’s Pizza: We’ll be back in 30 minutes or less, guaranteed. Use the DomiNoPage™ Tracker app for live updates.
A Day in the Life of Timothée Chalamet’s Stylist
10:00 AM --- Drink a latte and brainstorm ways to mix up this week’s photoshoots. Order some motor oil in bulk, in case hair gel “isn’t weird enough.”
I Am Urging You to Urge Others to Push for Climate Change Action
We just can’t continue on like this without telling everyone we know that we can’t continue on like this.
Writers With Benefits
Section 3: Foreplay: All types of textual foreplay is permitted, such as feeling really guilty when asking for feedback on their TV pilot.
Night at the Museum: Constitutional Crisis
Twenty-first Amendment (Abolition of Prohibition) This former frat-bro is a highly functioning alcoholic. Currently a member of the federal judiciary.
Highlights From Squanto’s Plymouth Colony Twitter Feed
“What’s the deal with @Massasoit contradicting himself everytime he mentions me in a tweet or talks to the press?”